Gains And Loss
by tiramisuspice
Summary: He chose her. And she took him. Not because she wanted to hurt Riley. Not because she wanted to win. But because she wanted to do something for herself for once.


**UPDATE 03.13.16:** **Riley's POV now up called Loss And Gains**

 **Sorry guys! There haven't been any updates or responses because I was working on this little monster piece. But I'm done soooo yeah :)**

 **This damn GM New Year promo angst is fucking with my head... I LOVE IT.**

 **Anyway, the promo birthed a random thought: What if GMW were actually some super angst-y over the top purposely exaggerated high school romantic teen drama show instead? How much worse could the Rucaya triangle romance actually have been? How much worse could the relationships have deteriorated? How bad could it have gotten? What if the worst aspects of this triangle, the most twisted aspects of the characters' issues with each other _were_ the focus? What if they all made mistakes that would affect their relationships severely? What would happen then?**

 **This is what my brain came up with and next thing I knew, I _had to_ write it, five page paper due be damned. Probably took me about 27 hours total to write in several different sessions. (Not including revision. Which was an absolute BITCH). There's _some_ canon content if it fits the story but most of it is mixed with AU. I don't normally write GMW "verse" pieces (I much prefer AUs) so I hope this worked out because I think my fingers are stuck in the same position from typing this for so long.**

 **Rated mostly High T but also kind of Borderline M for Melodramatic Situations**

 **(Let me warn you now that there is quite a bit of soft smut in some parts of this, but not M worthy smut, lol so I promise you won't get Stranded levels of eye blinding stuff in this. Buuuut, it's still fairly risqué in some ways, I guess, if you see soft smut as risqué. I personally don't, but again, you have been WARNED).**

 **Enjoy, my loves!**

 **Disclaimer: I own nothing but my imagination… (and of course these banana nut muffins I made :3)**

 **UPDATE 05.24.16** **: Revamped and more in depth and revised once again! A scene was added!**

* * *

There was always something between them. Something strange and hard to decipher but _poignant_ ever since Maya Hart met Lucas Friar that fateful day mid second semester when he moved to New York City.

He was the new kid her sophomore year of high school. The boy from Texas who suddenly showed up in Mr. Matthews' history class with a transcript and a slight smirk on his lips.

Lucas Friar in a nutshell: tall, tanned, hunky, beautiful sea-foam coloured eyes that could melt hearts, and a smile that could make panties drop.

Maya watched girls in her class descend into madness, tittering excitedly and swooning over the new attractive boy who had suddenly made their history class that much more interesting. She acted nonchalant, unconcerned, but she would be lying if she said she was immune to his looks. Even she couldn't deny that she kept sneaking glances. How could she not? The boy was fucking hot with a capital H.

And when his eyes met hers briefly as he took his seat behind her, Maya felt a thrill run down her back and chewed her bottom lip, hoping Mr. Matthews couldn't see the almost blush that was bound to show up on her face.

He asked her for a pencil.

Their fingers brushed together as she gave it to him, and she tried desperately not to show that she had felt a jolt of electricity between their fingertips from the touch.

~.~.~

By lunchtime, everyone knew about the hunky, super attractive new guy.

"He's in Maya's and my history class," Zay said, poking at the odd green concoction on his plate that was supposed to be mac and cheese. "Lucas Friar. He told me he's also from Austin today. We have a couple mutual friends back home. He seemed like a pretty cool guy from when we spoke. I like 'im."

"He's definitely a hunk. But he's not my type of hunk," Smackle said, leaning over and giving Farkle an eskimo kiss.

Farkle wrapped an arm around Smackle's shoulders, giving her a soft kiss that lingered, and Zay made a gag motion with his finger.

"Y'all two really need to tone it down with all the PDA. I know you're finally together, but do you have to do that where we eat our food?"

"Lucas is _so_ attractive," Riley suddenly gushed, her hands on her heart as she swooned. "He's so hot and sweet and friendly, and he looks like the fairy tale prince of my dreams."

"We get it already, Riley," Billy said with a roll of his eyes, "We know how amazing you think the new guy is and how chiselled his jaw line is and how intense his eyes are. Can we please talk about something else?"

"You've been awfully quiet all lunch, Maya," Zay said, nudging Maya suggestively, a knowing look in his eyes. "Got anything to add?"

"What's there to add?" Maya drawled, still working on her sketch in her notepad. "He's just a Huckleberry jock prince type. Sure, he's got looks, but he's not my type either. Too pretty boy. Probably a Momma's boy too. Wake me up when he's got some substance to him."

Conversation moved on to a new topic after that. Darby and Yogi were finally dating after years of being in denial and Maya fell silent, faking sketching in her pad with her headphones in her ears and stealing glances at Lucas on the other side of the lunch room every once in a while.

She had no doubt he was some preppy Momma's boy.

She dismissed him from her mind, disappointed that something interesting had finally happened at the school, and it was only some generic guy.

~.~.~

Maya usually made it a habit to be late to every class, not seeing the point of showing up right on the dot while Ms. Kossal made announcements and blabbed on and on about things regarding the school and project due dates and deadlines of which Maya had no interest.

But that day's Studio Art lecture would feature a special guest: two MOMA representatives were coming to speak to them about possible internships in the summer available for students who were interested, and she had to make a good first impression if she wanted to make some possible connections for the future.

She lamented the fact that she had decided to wear a short, tight bodycon dress with the high heeled booties her mom had bought her the day before. She could barely run or move fast for that matter and any wide steps she took made her dress ride higher up and threatened to put on display her panties for the entire world to see. It was the price to pay for deciding to look cute that day.

Maya checked her phone and noticed she had five minutes before class started.

"Shit…"

She skittered down the hall, sputtering to get her wild hair out of her mouth as it flew around her and then raced around a corner, a little off balance.

Only to run right into something solid and stumble back several steps. She was sure she would have tumbled to the ground and landed on her ass, but whoever they were had fast reflexes and caught her around the waist, holding her to them before she could hit the ground.

"Sorry. I didn't mean to run into you."

Maya looked up in slight surprise, a little alarmed since she had been bracing herself for pain, and it never came.

It was Lucas, looking down at her in concern.

"No, it's fine." Maya tucked a strand of hair behind her ear, a little mesmerized by the gorgeous colour of his eyes. "I shouldn't have been running around corners anyway."

He let go of her, and Maya took a step back, straightening her leather jacket and trying to ignore how his arms had felt around her.

"Hey, you're in my history class, right?" Lucas asked, suddenly looking a little sheepish.

"Yeah," Maya said, a slight frown on her face as she tried to figure out the best way to end this conversation so she could hurry up and get to her class. This was a distraction she really didn't need right now. "What do you want?"

"To be honest," he chuckled slightly in embarrassment, rubbing the back of his neck, "I'm a little lost."

Great. The last thing she needed was to help someone get to a class when she was barely on time herself. She didn't have time for this.

She was fixing to tell him to find someone else and split but when she glanced at him, staring at his schedule with a confused frown on his features and looking absolutely lost, she felt kind of bad. She remembered her first day of freshman year last year where she had been utterly confused on how to navigate the halls of JQA High. It hadn't been a pleasant experience.

"Okay." Maya rolled her eyes. "What class are you headed to?"

"Woodshop with Mr. Herman?"

"Oh. Yeah. I know where that is. I'm actually headed that way." Maya started walking briskly down the hall again, leaving it up to him to follow her. "Follow me."

"Oh thank goodness," he said in relief, matching her stride easily. "I had no idea where the fuck I was supposed to go. Why is there a zero in front of the classroom number when it isn't in the basement level?"

Maya snorted. "Yeah, the school is kind of fucked up that way. There's not enough room for elective courses in the high school so zero means the class is in the middle school section. All elective courses for middle school are on the second floor."

"Oh. Thanks." They walked in silence for a bit. "I'm Lucas, by the way. Lucas Friar."

"I know who you are. New guy from Texas," Maya replied, picking up her pace a bit when she realized she was absolutely going to be late. "I'm Maya. Maya Hart."

Somehow, they ended up talking about classical literature of all things while they hurried to their classes. Surprisingly, like her, he was a huge fan of Shakespeare—particularly his tragedies—and for the three minute walk to the middle school until she dropped him off at his class, they debated whether Romeo and Juliet was a love or hate story. As she suspected, he was in favour of love.

There wasn't anything special in particular about their conversation—if anything, they sounded like absolute literature nerds—but it had been surprisingly intriguing conversation. He had great points and challenged her opinion with reasonable and very concrete proof while she also managed to make him think twice about some of his stances. It had been a while since Maya found someone who could _properly_ discuss an opposing view with her since Riley tended to dismiss her viewpoint sometimes when they got into any kind of debate. The healthy discussion was refreshing, and surprisingly, she found herself subconsciously wanting to talk to him some more.

And that interaction made Maya realize maybe he wasn't quite the stereotypical smexy fucking cowboy jock type that she had categorized him as. He was also an intellectual and kind of sensitive and a slightly dorky guy. And though she wondered if she was imagining it, Maya could tell there was also something about Lucas that wasn't so sweet and nice. Something kind of dark that he seemed to be hiding, but that she could just about read lingering behind his eyes and just about see bubbling under his skin, trying to force its way out.

Something that Maya knew she was attracted to even though she tried to tell herself that she was only intrigued from their conversation.

~.~.~

By the end of Lucas' first week, everyone was fighting to recruit hot new guy into their friend group.

But Billy managed to succeed in snagging him up for their friend group when during gym Lucas kicked ass in baseball and Billy all but tethered himself to Lucas' hip and declared them best friends. And thus, Lucas was inducted as the newest member of the uber chill, well-rounded, and awesome group that Maya liked to call friends.

After that, hype about him eventually died down to just general interest as the week went by, but not for Maya.

For Maya, it was only the beginning.

She never realized just how much more intense it would get for her, though.

~.~.~

Riley had a huge, _huge_ crush on Lucas.

It wasn't like she particularly tried to hide it. If Lucas walked by her in the hallway, Riley would erupt in a deep blush. If Lucas was at his locker pulling books, she'd stop and stare with a dazed look on her face. She would sit at the front of the school, waiting until the very last moment to go to homeroom in hopes that when Lucas showed up, he might see her and say hi.

But as Maya watched her best friend fall deeper and deeper into this infatuation with Lucas, she started to feel a bit anxious. Maya knew they were attracted to the same guy, but she would never do anything that wouldn't make Riley happy. And if being with Lucas would make Riley happy, Maya knew she would step back. It wasn't a question of whether or not she should. She _would_ step back without a second thought. She wanted Riley to be happy no matter what.

But Riley was too scared to talk to Lucas since she didn't know what to say. Maya had random conversations with Lucas all the time, having already established herself with him as an acquaintance. So Riley had begged Maya to help her get to know Lucas so Riley could fix herself as a constant in his life before Missy Bradford snatched him up. Missy was in Lucas and Riley's Algebra class too and apparently Missy had spent the entire class period flirting with Lucas. To Riley, it seemed like he would develop an interest in the queen of their grade if things continued the way they were.

And as much as Maya didn't really want to play wingwoman, she did so, disregarding her own feelings on the matter.

"Hey Ranger Rick," Maya said, sauntering up to him, a smirk on her lips, "you started on that history project yet?"

Lucas turned around from his locker in slight confusion, looking at her as if trying to figure out who she was talking to. When he realized it was him, his lips quirked up in an amused smile.

"Ranger Rick?"

Maya shrugged, a playful brow raised. "What? You're from Texas."

"Alright then, _Shortstack_." Lucas smirked, leaning his arm on the locker beside her head. Maya's eyes narrowed. "What? You're short."

She rolled her eyes, if only to mask the giddiness that was bubbling up in her chest at having his undivided attention.

"Have you started on the research for the project yet?" she repeated.

"Actually, no. I didn't really feel like starting it."

"Didn't take you for a procrastinator, Bucky McBoingBoing."

Lucas quirked a brow, leaning a bit closer to her. "Where do you pull all these nicknames from?"

"Where do you think?" Maya said playfully.

Lucas' eyes took on a slightly hooded look, one that Maya recognized all too well. One that made Maya's pulse start to race. She knew the conversation was heading towards being full on flirting, something she couldn't allow. She was supposed to be the wingwoman. The catalyst to Riley's happiness with Lucas.

"Anyway, I'm heading over to the library after school." Maya cleared her throat, averting her gaze with a frown. "You should come with. Riley volunteers there sometimes. She can help you find what you need for the project."

"Riley?" he asked absentmindedly, still gazing down at Maya even as she gestured over to where Riley was staring at them in anticipation.

"Riley." Maya repeated, reaching up and turning his head in Riley's direction.

With their gazes on her, Riley squeaked in surprise, her cheeks going red as she quickly tried to spin around and pretend like she hadn't been watching them converse. She pretended like she was texting on her phone and almost tripped on her feet walking around the corner to hide herself.

Lucas chuckled. "Cute."

Maya's heart sank when she glanced at him.

"We're leaving after 3:30," Maya said, pushing away from the lockers and walking away from him without another word.

Maya went over to Riley around the corner, trying to hide the disappointment on her face. That was right. Riley was the cute one. The one who people were naturally drawn to. Lucas was no different. There was no point in getting melancholic about it.

"What happened? Did you get me an in?" Riley asked with baited breath, her cherry brown eyes dancing in excitement.

"Yeah…" Maya smiled. At least Riley got what she wanted. "I got you an in."

It wasn't the last time Maya played wingwoman for Riley either. She constantly helped her with Lucas. Gave her tips on what to say, how to talk to Lucas without spazzing, and giving her more and more opportunities to spend time with him. And slowly, they started spending more time together without Maya's intervention as Riley grew more confident.

Maya knew Lucas was perfect for Riley. They were two fundamentally good people on the good side of the tracks while Maya was most definitely on the bad. As much as it pained her to admit it, she knew her feelings for Lucas were doomed from the start. People on the good side of the tracks never ended up with people like her. It was best to just give up on him.

And so, Maya pretended like she couldn't stand him sometimes, like he annoyed her, like he wasn't her type, like she thought him as only this goofy cowboy from Texas and pushed Riley to him all the while.

~.~.~

Riley asked Lucas to the end of sophomore year Sadie Hawkins dance before anyone else could get him.

And Lucas said yes.

He brought Maya a red rose and dressed like a cowboy just to mess with her, alternated between dancing with Riley and pranking people with Maya all night, and both girls were absolutely enamoured by the end of the night.

Maya hid it well.

Riley did not.

And by the start of their junior year at JQA High, Lucas and Riley were a thing.

People began to count the days they would become an official couple. And Maya made her decision to move on, deciding to pursue Josh, Riley's uncle and her unrequited crush since she had been young. He transferred to NYU in his junior year of college and was more readily available. With all the time he spent in his brother's apartment, it gave Maya ample time to try to get him interested, if only to try to take her mind off of the fact that the guy she kind of liked had a thing with her best friend. Maya flirted with Josh shamelessly, and he laughed at her jokes and kindly obliged although Maya knew he didn't have any feelings for her when he turned down her confession.

Josh was sweet, though. They had the same taste in music and he had something of a rebellious streak in a way too. Or at least, a difficult streak that always exasperated his parents, so they became closer friends too. He would pick her up sometimes and take her to concerts or to just chill at obscure coffee shops he found so they could make fun of the fake hipsters. It was a good distraction from her often consistent heartache at seeing the guy she had feelings for with her best friend.

There were times when Maya would catch Lucas staring at them though, his jaw clenched and expression a little dark as Maya would run to Josh's car after school. Times when he would be over hanging out with Riley, yet his attention would be on Maya and her flirtations with Josh.

Maya wanted to believe that Lucas could possibly be jealous, but she wasn't about to have hope in something that was a lost cause, especially when he was still in a something-like-a relationship with Riley. And especially when she knew better than to think someone would ever want her over her bubbly best friend.

She'd given up on him.

And it was a good thing she had too.

In the end, Lucas became Riley's unofficial boyfriend during the rest of junior year to senior year and was considered off the market since they were always together. Maya had it on good authority from Riley that they spent the entire summer talking after they'd had their first kiss at the end of junior year. So, it came as no surprise to anyone when senior year started, and Lucas asked Riley out in the hallway on the first day of school after some badgering from his friends about when he would make it official. The two _officially_ dated for about a week and a half into the start of senior year, then called it quits, deciding the pressure to date and label themselves was ruining their relationship and making things more awkward.

When Riley told Maya this, Maya felt guilty because she was secretly happy. Secretly pleased that things hadn't progressed and that they were stuck in a limbo after their disastrous venture into being an actual real couple. That they'd stepped back and now neither was quite sure what they were.

She read Riley's diary. Read excerpts about Lucas to see just how far the two might have gone. Maya wasn't sure why she was torturing herself with this info, especially if there was a possibility that they had already gone all the way, but she needed to know. And she was utterly relieved to find Riley and Lucas had gone no further than a few intense makeout sessions because Riley was too uncomfortable going past second base.

Maya knew it was wrong to feel relief. She knew it was wrong and two-faced to support her best friend's relationship to her face while secretly wishing for the relationship to fail, but she couldn't help it.

Liking someone made people crazy sometimes.

And Maya wasn't immune to that crazy.

~.~.~

And then Lucas got into a fight with someone.

Some asshole who Maya had been casually sleeping with on and off had been talking shit about her and calling her a slut during lunch and all of a sudden, Lucas was no longer _just_ a good lil' Momma's boy on the good side of the tracks. All of a sudden, her suspicions that there was something dark about Lucas were validated. All of a sudden, it was undeniable that Lucas Friar _was_ completely and totally and very much fully her type.

The truth came out.

Lucas moved to New York for a fresh start after getting expelled from his last high school. She realized that Lucas Moral Compass Friar was not as clean cut and squeaky clean as he portrayed himself. That he had one foot across the line in the sand dividing the good kids from the bad.

Mr. Perfect's perfect image shattered.

Suddenly, Lucas Friar was obtainable. And Maya could not lie that knowing that he had this dark and difficult past excited her.

"You've been hiding this dirty secret for three years!" Riley shouted at Lucas, her hands on her hips as Maya meticulously put some salve on his bruised knuckles. Even she had to wince at the sheer volume of Riley's tone. "Has our entire relationship all been a lie?"

"We're in a nurse's office, Riley. Quiet down a bit." Maya muttered.

Riley ignored her. "Tell me what you did to get kicked out of school."

Lucas remained silent, a frown on his face as he stared out the window.

"Oh so you can't even tell me that either. Do I even know you anymore?"

"Riley, would you calm down?" Lucas growled, grimacing when Maya cleaned the cut on his other hand with an alcohol prep pad. "I'm still the same me."

"Are you, though? Are you really? If you lied about this, what else did you lie about? Your name? Is your name even really Lucas?"

"Riley, just chill out." Maya scoffed, rolling her eyes. Riley shot her an annoyed look. "Look, someone's maybe shady past doesn't define who they are in the present, okay? Look at me. You remember how I used to be? Rebellious, always in trouble, terrible grades, never trying, never attempting to make something of myself. I was on a fast track to becoming a delinquent or a deadbeat. Am I the same person I was in our youth? No. You shouldn't fault him for wanting to hide his past. And even with it, it doesn't change who he has become now because it doesn't matter."

Riley didn't respond, her eyes still narrowed in irritation as she crossed her arms in front of her chest.

Lucas sighed in exasperation. "Why the hell are you so mad about my past?"

"If you think that's what I'm mad about, Lucas, then you obviously don't know me. And I don't know you."

And Riley spun on her heels, storming out of the nurse's office in a cloud of sweet perfume and brown hair flowing freely behind her.

"…Why is she being so stubborn about this?" Lucas muttered, more to himself than to Maya.

"Riley just has trouble accepting change," Maya said, lifting his chin and gently dabbing at the cut on his eyebrow with a q-tip covered in salve, "but she'll loosen up eventually once she gets over it. Don't expect that to be any time soon though."

Lucas stared up at her contemplatively. Maya tried to ignore how his gaze set her pulse on fire. It kind of annoyed her that even after two years of being acquainted, she still got butterflies when he looked at her.

"…Thank you," he said after a while.

"For what?"

"For being understanding."

"I mean, why wouldn't I be?" Maya snorted, tossing the used items in the trash can near the chair. "Besides. Whatever bad, bad things you might have done at your old school, you're still such a Huckleberry."

"Thanks," Lucas repeated softly, his eyes still on her.

Maya slowly dropped her hands from his face when she was done, slightly chewing on her lower lip as they held each other's gaze. Her heart was hammering in her chest at something in his eyes she couldn't quite place. She wasn't used to being nervous around any guys, but Lucas made her feel different, like he was actually _seeing_ her. And it kind of scared her.

"You should…" Maya cleared her throat and broke eye contact, staring out the window as she slipped her hands in her pockets to keep from fidgeting with the hem of her top. "You should probably go after Riley. Try to patch things up."

"…Yeah, you're right."

Lucas stood up and made his way out of the nurse's office, and Maya closed her eyes momentarily, trying to ignore the way her heart felt like it was twisting in her chest.

"Maya," he said, stopping at the doorway. Maya turned towards him, though she still didn't quite look at him. "You still coming over to work on that physics assignment?"

"Yeah, Sundance. I'll be there."

He smiled.

"Good."

~.~.~

There was a shift in Maya's relationship with Lucas after that.

Day by day, they continued to grow closer. Lucas was easy and fun to talk to. He was more physically playful than she expected, especially considering how polite and reserved and gentlemanly he was when dating Riley. He was constantly tickling Maya, playing with her hair, or picking her up to mess with her about her height, but it was nice to have a guy she could chill with without said guy constantly trying to hook up with her. Sometimes she just wanted to chat. Lucas was the perfect person for chatting, and she could easily goof off with and play around with and tease the majority of the time without him getting offended or annoyed. He had endless patience, and unlike Riley at times, he never judged her for some of her misguided or poor decisions. He just gave her some advice, and when the need called for it, he would stop her from making a bad choice without overruling her own decisions or stepping on her toes and trying to control her.

But their conversations weren't all playful though.

Sometimes they would just hit each other up to talk about the worst things in their lives and things they were struggling to deal with.

She told him her deepest secret and regret for losing her virginity at the start of high school. She'd never told Riley that secret because she knew Riley would judge her for it. Riley wouldn't have understood Maya's blasé attitude towards intimacy back when she was younger because of the way her mother's relationships tended to deteriorate. She would have tried to force Maya to see the error in her ways regardless of the fact that what's done was done. Even now, she still saw sex as meaningless, a means for quick fixes for pleasure, but not intimate.

Maya was completely surprised when Lucas revealed to her that he'd lost his virginity to an ex-girlfriend who he'd been in love with back in Texas. She'd been a year older and experienced, and he'd burned rubber with how fast he fell for her. He'd called it his curse for falling for people too fast. When he moved to New York, it had taken her one day to hop into bed with someone else, and Lucas realized it had never even been serious for her. Since then, he'd decided to swear off sex until he felt he was with someone he honestly knew he could love. He saw sex as something sacred to be shared with two people who truly loved one another and could honestly give all of themselves to each other.

She showed him her scars. He showed her his.

Maya shared her feelings of thinking she was stuck in the same cycle as her mother. Stuck in a future of being left all the time or being someone who wouldn't get good things in life. Wanting to pave her own future, but feeling like she was being held back and tethered to the things that used to define her life before she decided to turn it around. Sometimes she felt like she was a background character in her life and only necessary to lift up others and make their lives better.

Lucas told her about his terrifying, haunting life with the father who had psychologically and emotionally abused his mother and him. The unhealable scars that had been permanently left on his heart. How he developed a temper through the years. How fighting just became so easy. How when he lost his temper, his instinct had always been to use physical force. That he'd gotten better thanks to being able to talk to her, and that she was a calming presence in his life.

When Maya's dad came back wanting to be a part of her life again, Lucas let her stay with him to hide away from the man she refused to see until he left town once again. She still hadn't forgiven him for deserting them for the sake of his drugs. When Lucas' father and mother went to court for the custody battle they'd been fighting for years, Maya was right there with Lucas, holding his hand through the case and held him as he cried on her shoulder when his mother won and he found out he wouldn't have to go back and live with his abusive father until he turned eighteen.

They saw each other at their best.

They saw each other at their worst.

And through it all they developed an innate trust between them. A bond through their strong friendship. They knew they both could rely on each other no matter what the situation. Lucas listened to her. He valued her as a person and took her opinions to heart. He never pressed her to share what was on her mind and gave her space when she needed it. He quelled her fears. And in turn, she liked to think she did the same for him. He became a constant in her life, her confidante, her support system, and in some ways, a best friend.

The more she learned about him, the more she realized he wasn't just a good little Momma's boy from Honky Tonky Town.

And it only made it harder to ignore her feelings for him.

~.~.~

"Good thing they have free popcorn," Lucas muttered crossly, plopping down on the picnic blanket next to Maya and holding out a bag to her. "Or I would have complained to the event coordinators about depleting our wallets since parking damn near cost me a fortune."

Maya rolled her eyes as she popped a small handful in her mouth. "Still going on about the damn parking, Huckleberry?"

He rose a brow. "Ten dollars for a two hour movie is not a good deal. Why couldn't we just stay at my place and chill?"

"Because I didn't want to," Maya said sharply, pulling her knees up to her chest.

She needed to be out and about. She needed the distraction to take her mind off of things, which was why she had hit up Lucas after his football practice and requested they go to the public park's outdoor screening of Casanova instead of watching a movie at his house as usual. She needed a switch up just for a day.

Her soured mood wasn't lost on Lucas and he turned to face her, a frown on his face in concern from her sharp tone.

"What's wrong?"

She sighed, knowing even if she didn't want to talk about it now, Lucas would remain concerned until she did. "I broke things off with a guy I was screwing. And he didn't take it well."

He frowned. "What did he say to you? Do I need to kick his ass?"

"Cool it, Rambo. I took care of it." Maya couldn't help but smile from Lucas' protective streak though. She knew she could always count on him to have her back. "Besides all he said was some shit about me never being good enough for anybody other than as a booty call."

"That's not true," Lucas said immediately, his jaw clenched in irritation.

"I know… I just…" Maya leaned back against her palms, stretching her legs out with a sigh. "For some reason, I let it get to me. It made me question if I really am only good for flings. I mean, look at the types of relationships I've had my whole life. "

"Maya. Just because you haven't had a steady relationship does not mean that you're only good for flings." Lucas shrugged, staring at the grass. "Somewhere out there, there's probably some guy who wants to give you the world."

She snickered, shaking her head in mirth. "I doubt it. I'm not getting my hopes up for some unknown guy who could very well be a figment of imagination. Hope is for suckers."

He stared at her for a few seconds, his expression a little peeved. She knew he was about to argue with her. And she wasn't in the mood to debate this right now.

"How would you know? The only guys you try to go for are dicks. Find some guy who'll respect you more, and you'll stop having to deal with these assholes." Lucas pointed out, unfazed despite the fact that Maya rose a dangerous brow. "Look, what I'm saying is one day… maybe you'll find the right guy who'll show you how amazing a _real_ relationship can be."

"And one day, I'm sure you're going to make someone a great fortune cookie." She snorted, turning back towards the large projector screen since the movie had begun to play. "You're such a sap, Ranger Rick. You're going to make me barf."

"I'm serious, Maya," Lucas said in a soft voice, taking her chin in his hand and turning her face so she was focusing on him. Maya's heart skipped a beat in her chest when her eyes met his. "A real relationship is more than sex. It's a safe place and one that builds you up to be a better you. Those guys you like to go for? They're jerks. And you deserve better."

Like Lucas.

"…Like who?"

He said nothing, though there was heat in his eyes that set Maya's pulse on fire. She knew her cheeks were probably burning with a blush. Part of her wanted to think that he was talking about himself.

"Alright already," she finally said after the silence had dragged on forever. She took his hand off her face, turning back towards the screen. Every time she tried to forget about Lucas, he always did something that only served to further amplify her feelings for him. "I get the point. I'll treat myself better."

"If you don't, I'll know." Lucas warned playfully. "And then I won't stop bugging you."

"What a terrifying threat," Maya half-joked.

She wouldn't put it past him to actually do it though. He was stubborn that way.

Lucas also turned back towards the large projector screen, snorting in amusement. They grew quiet as they watched the film, but Maya's eyes kept drifting over to him whenever she thought he wouldn't notice. She couldn't help it. She knew she was smitten.

And while the movie lasted—just for those two hours—she let herself have hope that maybe what was between them wasn't _just_ a friendship.

~.~.~

But no matter how much closer Maya got to Lucas, no matter how much she started to believe that maybe there were some growing feelings, there was always something between them that would forever prevent anything from happening:

Riley.

It was Thursday night, the day before the Homecoming game. For the seniors, it meant showing up to school that night as was tradition and spending the entire evening decorating the school for the school spirit festivities. A friendly game of football had sprung up amongst some of her friends as they took a break from that task.

"Alright. Fourth down. We're down by five. We _need_ a touchdown to beat the other team," Maya said in her huddle, meeting all her teammates' eyes in turn. "Darby, you run by the sideline and fake that you have the football. I'll mimic you on the opposite side so we can confuse a couple of them and get them out of the way. We're going to both cross and run behind Lucas and fake catching a pass and having the ball. Lucas, you're quarterback. The rest of you stay on whoever you've been on. Wyatt and Yogi, I need you both to block Billy's path to Lucas. He's going to try to get him, and we can't let that happen."

" _Yogi_?" Darby said in affront. "You're putting my beautiful baby boo thang in danger of being trampled by Billy? You do realize he's on our actual football team right?! Make Lucas block Billy! He's the only one on our team who can keep up with him."

"We need Lucas to throw because no one else can throw to the endzone. And in a precise direction. And don't worry about Yogi the Yogurt. He's more slippery than you think he is," Maya said with a wink, fist bumping Yogi. "We've got a plan."

"You want an endzone pass?" Lucas asked with a frown. "Well who's the receiver?"

"Farkle," Maya said simply.

Everyone's eyes widened as they turned to said brunet in surprise. Farkle's eyebrows skipped high on his forehead in shock.

"Wait, what? I only play safety when we're on defense, Maya."

"Not this time. We need the element of surprise. While everyone is going after us, I need someone they least expect to be given the ball. That's you. No one will take you seriously and you'll be ignored for sure. By the time they realize who Lucas threw it to, you'll already be in the endzone."

Lucas stared at her incredulously. "Maya, you're forgetting that Farkle can't catch. Plus, he's scared of the ball."

"He'll catch this one."

"That's risky. I just don't think that's a good play."

There was a stunned silence and a few gasps from everyone else as Maya's gaze suddenly turned sharp and glinty from Lucas' words. Maya straightened and broke free from the huddle, walking through the middle of it to Lucas. When she reached him, she grabbed his shirt and pulled him harshly towards her until they were face to face.

"You questioning my leadership, Hopalong?" she growled, her eyes narrowed dangerously.

"Okay. These names you're giving me are killing my street cred."

"Awww," Maya cooed derisively. "And what would you like me to call you?"

"I'd like you to call me _Mad Dawg_."

"You don't seem like a Mad Dawg to me." Maya batted her eyelashes in a show of mock innocence.

Lucas smirked, his voice dropping to a low murmur. "Well what do I seem like to you…"

"You know that lamb that Mary had?"

"…I don't like the way this is going…"

Her gaze momentarily dropped down to his lips before she slowly dragged her eyes back up and met his. Lucas' smirk slowly slid off his face, his gaze darkening the slightest bit as he stared down at her. They fell silent, the world around them seemingly disappearing as their gazes remained locked.

"Stop flirting!" Darby commented suddenly. "C'mon! Let's get a move on! We have a team to beat."

She broke away from Lucas in slight surprise, blinking a bit because she hadn't even realized they had gotten that close in the first place.

"We weren't flirting." Maya turned back to her team, her hands on her hips. "Anyway, Farkle's receiving. No buts. We got this guys. Let's beat these motherfuckers."

" _Break_!"

Her strategy was a risky one, especially with Farkle who, despite having impervious calculations and being unbelievably incredible at figuring out the best trajectory in order to make successful passes, only caught about one in eight passes. Maya hoped that this could be that lucky pass he caught.

They called it.

Her team ran.

Lucas threw it to Farkle.

And just as Maya expected, no one saw it coming.

The ball careened through the air, the perfect spiral as it made its way to a wide eyed, nervous Farkle in the endzone. Billy shouted for the rest of his team to get Farkle, but by that point it was too late.

It was like slow motion for everybody watching the game, their eyes on the ball and Farkle.

He caught it.

It bounced out of his hands and flew back into the air.

She heard Darby scream in despair.

Maya gripped her hair, eyes wide and hoping this was not happening.

And then Farkle reached out again and caught it, hugging it to his chest.

There was silence for a moment.

And then resounding cheers as her team screamed ' _Touchdown_!', hopping around and celebrating their win.

"In yo face!" Maya shouted at Billy, returning the lewd gesture he'd given her at the start of the game before whipping around and sauntering towards Lucas.

"See what happens when you don't question my leadership?"

"That was amazing!"

She hopped into his waiting arms without thought as he easily caught her, spinning her around as they laughed, celebrating their victory. It wasn't even that big a deal, but adrenaline was high, and Farkle had just made an intense catch that could have easily ended in a tragic loss for their team.

"Lucas!" Maya exclaimed, sliding her hands on his shoulders as he stopped spinning her and set her down. "We won!"

Lucas' brows rose, a bit stunned, his arms slowly sliding out from around her back until his hands were resting on her waist.

"Did you just call me Lucas…?"

Crap.

Maya could feel her cheeks burning with a slight blush as she searched his eyes.

"…I've always known your name."

They stared at each other, Maya's heart racing in her chest at the slight gleam in Lucas' dancing eyes. She'd been seeing that look in his eyes more and more often as he looked at her. And she couldn't lie, it made her heart skip beats in her chest.

It made her think it had to mean something.

It made her think that maybe he wanted her just as much as she was trying to hide that she wanted him.

"That's my best friend everyone!" Came Riley's voice from the sideline. "Maya Hart led that team to victory!"

It broke whatever trance they had put themselves in.

Lucas dropped his hands from Maya's waist rather abruptly and cleared his throat. He averted his gaze and then jogged over to the sidelines where Riley was hopping up and down in excitement. Maya told herself to ignore them. To let it go.

But curiosity got the best of her, and she made the mistake of turning to watch them.

"I thought you were supposed to be my personal cheerleader," Lucas said playfully to Riley.

"Now Lucas. Maya's my best friend," she chastised sweetly as she wiped away some of the eye black on Lucas' face. "But you did well. So you get a reward too."

She rose to her tiptoes and pressed a soft kiss on his cheek. When she pulled away, he smiled, a soft little thing that made Maya's face drop. She looked away, trying to ignore the fact that her spirits had dampened quite a bit with that one action.

But she knew it was something she should have expected. Riley and Lucas still had their little thing after all. And given a choice, she had no doubt that he would choose Riley.

She pushed it to the back of her mind and forced a smile on her face, running over to Farkle and starting up a chant to cheer his name.

~.~.~

Sometime, a little after Lucas turned eighteen, his Pappy Joe came to New York and surprised him with a gift of signing him up in an adult division bullriding competition to ride Tombstone the bull. He'd apparently been acquainted with Tombstone once and had a chance to ride the bull but he never got the chance to actually try because outside forces beyond his control had prevented him from it when he'd had to move to New York with his parents' separation.

But now was his chance once more.

Lucas had been over the moon happy about it and of course, he'd invited his friends to stay in Texas with him for the weekend. Zay was already fairly well versed with Austin, so he was pretty much the navigator. It was funny to see Lucas and Zay go back to their Texan roots and amp up the exaggerated Texan stereotypes.

It had been fun all afternoon, checking out sights and having the chance to look at famous places. Maya could honestly say she really loved the food and the music wasn't so bad, and she definitely was a huge fan of the country chic outfits she could wear, especially when Lucas was left speechless and wouldn't take his eyes off of her. He'd complimented her; told her she looked good, and Maya had his words on replay in her head the rest of the morning.

It truly had been fun.

But then shit hit the fan when it came time for Lucas to ride Tombstone.

And Maya _saw_ Tombstone.

And suddenly, Maya realized just what a huge danger it was to him when some other guy before Lucas was flung off the bull and his ribs were crushed when Tombstone trampled on top of him. He was rushed away in an ambulance, and Maya couldn't get the agonized screams of that man's girlfriend and the blood dripping from his mouth out of her head.

And Maya flipped her shit at Lucas, telling him he couldn't go through with it.

"You can't ride that bull!" she repeated, gesturing frantically to the screen and ignoring everyone's stares on her. "So please just take off that stupid outfit so we can leave here."

Maybe Maya had overreacted, but just the thought of losing Lucas was wrecking her. But could you blame her? What she felt for him went well past friendship, she knew, and she kept seeing an image of a bloodied Lucas on a stretcher, being rushed away in an ambulance.

He said nothing, still staring at her with furrowed brows.

"Lucas. Look at me," she said, forcing her voice not to waver. She could feel the back of her eyes stinging with tears that she desperately tried not to let fall. "If you ride that bull… I'm never speaking to you again."

They all stared at Maya in stunned silence at the ultimatum she'd given him. She didn't care.

"Maya, don't be silly," Riley said. "Lucas has to ride that bull. He needs to complete the goal he never got the chance to do."

"Maya…" Lucas said.

But he didn't change his mind. She could see it in his eyes. The apology in his gaze as he stared at her. But also a determination that she knew couldn't be shaken.

He'd made his choice.

So now she would make hers.

"I'm never speaking to you again."

And Maya left.

~.~.~

She had been sitting on the swing attached to Pappy Joe's large oak tree at the front of his house when she heard her name being called. Riley walked up the driveway over to her, her expression a little concerned.

"Have you been sitting here the whole time, Maya? Did you really not watch Lucas on Tombstone?"

Maya nodded, not particularly paying attention to Riley. Her thoughts were still lingering on the man who'd gotten badly injured, only his face kept getting replaced with Lucas'. It was terrifying, and the fact that she knew Lucas knew she'd been scared and still had no qualms riding the bull was hurting her more than she wanted to admit.

Asshole.

"He did _amazing_ , you know? Broke a record. Won a trophy," Riley continued with awe in her voice. "And he's fine, if not a little sore from landing on his back."

Maya remained silent, scuffing the toe of her cowboy boots on the patch of land and watching brown dust fly up. She was glad he was okay, but honestly, she wasn't in any mood to be celebrating. When it became clear Maya wasn't planning on answering, Riley sighed in exasperation.

"Maya, why did you get so freaked out about Lucas riding the bull? It's not like you to get so worked up about things. And especially not over Lucas. I mean the way you were acting was like a scared girlfriend. It's almost as if…"

Riley tapered away, her musings incomplete as silence reigned between them, only the distant sound of birds being heard. When Maya lifted her gaze and met Riley's, there was a look of shock in her best friend's eyes. A look of shock and a slight gleam of understanding that made Maya bristle a bit.

"You have feelings for Lucas…"

Maya's face twisted into a grimace. "Riley… Don't."

"You couldn't watch him on the bull because you have feelings for him," Riley stated, sounding more and more confident with each piece she uncovered of the puzzle. "You've had feelings for Lucas for years, haven't you? But you stepped back…"

Maya averted her gaze and stared at her boots dragging on the dirt on the ground.

"Tell me the truth, Maya. Sisters tell each other the truth, don't they?" Riley pressed, gently taking Maya's chin and tilting it up. "Do you have feelings for Lucas?"

Maya contemplated lying for a second, but she knew Riley would be able to see the lie in her eyes.

"…I didn't want anyone to find out. Especially not you."

Riley remained silent, her hand falling from Maya's chin as she contemplated her curiously. Maya couldn't tell what was going through Riley's mind, but before she could ask or say anything, their whole group came around the bend and up the driveway, heading back to Pappy Joe's ranch and laughing loudly, clapping Lucas on the back. As their gazes landed on the two girls, they quieted, staring at them as they faced off.

"Maya, you missed it," Billy said, trying to lighten the heavy air. "Lucas kicked ass on that bull."

Maya ignored the comment, still staring at Riley, though she did see Lucas in her peripheral vision. He was standing straight and tall, a little dusty, but not injured. She felt the tension in her back loosen up and mentally released a sigh of relief. Riley's brows furrowed momentarily before she whirled around and walked right up to Lucas.

"Lucas, can I talk to you?"

He turned his attention to Riley. "Yeah?"

"You know you're important to me, right?"

"Yeah. You're important to me too," Lucas said with a smile. Maya momentarily closed her eyes, hating the way her heart was squeezing in her chest. "And thanks for supporting me and being there for me this whole time. It's nice to know you believe in me."

Maya's fists clenched tighter around the swing's rope. Something about his undertone made Maya feel like it was a jab aimed at her for not sticking around to watch him on Tombstone.

"I'll always believe in you. And I will always be here."

"I know. Thank you."

"But Lucas. We've been stuck in this weird limbo thing between friends and being a couple for two years. And when we tried dating, it just didn't work," Riley said without prelude, glancing briefly at Maya, something odd in her expression. "We could barely talk, and we couldn't connect. And… I don't like that."

Lucas frowned in confusion. "What are you saying?"

"I feel like this unofficial thing we have isn't going anywhere because we just don't see each other as romantic partners. So let's just end this thing for real. I only see you as a friend. And you only see me as a friend. That's what we are. We're just friends."

There was silence among their friends as they looked between the two of them with wide eyes and slackened jaws. Maya's head lifted, and she stared at Riley in shock at her declaration. What the hell was going on?

"Oh that is fucking _awk_ -waaard…" Zay muttered.

"I'm confused. What brought this on?" Lucas looked bewildered. "Did I do something to make you want to end our relationship?"

"Lucas. We didn't have a relationship. Not a real one," Riley said softly. "There were so many things in the way of a real one. Peer pressure, labels, communication issues, insecurities… people around us…"

Then Riley pivoted on her heel, fixing Maya with an astute stare, her expression indecipherable.

"Lucas, Maya likes you."

"Riley!" Maya yelled indignantly, her eyes widening in shock.

"It's why she couldn't watch you on Tombstone," Riley continued anyway, her gaze still trained on Maya. "She's liked you for years. But she stepped back."

Jaws dropped even more at the revelation, surprise on everyone's faces as they stared at the three. Lucas turned slowly to Maya, a bewildered wonder in his gaze as their eyes met.

"Maya…?"

Maya frowned and shot up from the swing, stomping away to the inside of the house without a word, her fists clenched furiously.

She didn't want to sit there.

She didn't want to see his gaze turn into pity.

She didn't want to see him reject her for Riley.

~.~.~

They'd gone to a saloon styled nightclub called Wild Horse that night to party it up with the locals and get wasted on liquor bought with fakes. Like its name suggested, it was _wild_. On her way back from the bathroom, Maya caught sight of Farkle trying to stay on the mechanical bull to a cheering crowd and being flung around like a rag doll. Billy was making out with someone he'd been chatting up against the wall. Zay was on the dance floor with an old flame named Vanessa. But when she caught sight of Lucas and Riley near the dance floor talking closely, she snapped her gaze away, deciding she'd had enough of heartbreak for once.

Honestly, it could have been a lot of fun at the club, and Maya usually was all for partying wildly, but Maya wasn't in a particularly party mood anymore. Much less a good mood. Part of her still wanted to enjoy her weekend in Texas, but the other part of her wanted to go home, curl under her covers, and cry.

How had things gotten so screwed up so fast?

Why did Riley have to tell him? It hadn't been her place to, and she had seriously been out of line.

She'd fucked up everything.

Maya leaned her elbows on the bar, knocking back the two shots of rum that she'd stealthily snagged from a waitress' tray before she made her way to another party's table. They burned as they went down, but she didn't care. She wanted to turn her mind into sludge. She just wanted to forget about that awkward afternoon. She'd been avoiding Lucas like the plague, giving him an absolute silent treatment despite how many times he'd attempted to talk to her.

"I find it hard to believe that a cutie like you is sitting at a bar all by yourself," a guy said, sidling up next to her and sitting on the stool beside her with a charming smile. "You with someone?"

He was cute. Soft brown eyes from what she could tell with the dimmed lighting. He had a curly brown mop all over his head and an adorable thick accent that was just a tiny bit comical.

Maya rose a brow, a small, flirty smile on her lips, running her hand through her hair to get it out of her face.

"Depends. Who's asking?"

"I am. I'm Ronnie." His grin grew. "Thought you'd like some company. So you with someone or what?"

"I'm alone as you can see."

"Lucky me…" Ronnie's eyes ran down Maya's body, lingering on her belly button ring and exposed midriff for a moment before he met her gaze again. "You probably get this a lot, but you're fucking hot."

"I know I'm hot," Maya said arrogantly. "Is that the best you've got? You're going to have to try a lot harder than that, Ronnie."

"Then let me just be frank. I just want to fuck you," Ronnie murmured, leaning closer to her, his hand creeping up her thigh under her denim skirt. "If you're up for it, of course. I don't mind a quickie in the bathroom. No strings. What do you say?"

"She's not interested," Lucas growled from behind her, suddenly appearing out of nowhere. "Get your fucking hand off of her."

Ronnie snapped his hand immediately off of Maya, his eyes widening as he looked at Lucas. Maya spun on her stool and gave Lucas an incredulous, annoyed glare. He looked livid, his teeth grit and eyes glinting with rage as he stared down the curly haired boy.

"Hey man, sorry." Ronnie stood up abruptly, his hands raised in apology. "She told me she wasn't with anyone."

"She is."

"No hard feelings, right?" Ronnie turned around and hurried away.

And Maya's eyes narrowed angrily.

"Maya, what were you thinking?" Lucas chastised. "You know what he wanted. Why were you letting him get so close?"

"Who the hell do you think you are?!" Maya suddenly shouted, hopping off her stool and jabbing Lucas sharply in the chest. "Nobody asked you to come out of nowhere and ruin my chances of getting laid, you asshole!"

"What…" Lucas' eyes looked like they were on fire in the dimmed lighting. "You actually wanted to…?"

Maya rolled her eyes with a disgusted scoff and shoved past him, storming through Wild Horse and to the front into an empty party room where it was quieter. She took a deep breath, closing her eyes momentarily and running her hand through her hair, trying to cool her head as she leaned against the pool table.

She couldn't let Lucas affect her like this.

But just as that thought crossed her mind, the door swung open, banging against the frame before bouncing back and slamming shut as Lucas walked in, his jaw clenched as he made his way over to her. Maya spun around in surprise, but when she saw who it was she let out an exasperated growl under her breath.

" _Go away_ , you damn Huckleberry!"

"What the fuck is your problem, Maya?" Lucas barked, "Why the hell are you still mad at me?"

"Why do you think?! I'm mad because you could have gotten seriously hurt on that stupid fucking bull! And you still rode it anyway even though I begged you not to!"

"But I didn't get hurt! I'm fine, aren't I?"

"It doesn't matter! What do you think you getting hurt would have done to the people who…"

Maya tapered off, swallowing her words and letting go of the breath she had been holding. Lucas searched her eyes, his scowl loosening slowly as realization dawned in his eyes.

He stepped closer to her.

"Care about me?"

Maya licked her lips nervously and stubbornly looked away, glaring at the taxidermy moose head attached to the wall.

"Are you saying…" Lucas' hands cradled her face, and he gently turned her so she was looking at him again. " _You_ care about me?"

Maya refused to answer, her heart racing in her chest as the expression in Lucas' eyes changed. As it grew a bit heated. As his gaze made her feel like she was laid bare before him. She hated it. She hated how Lucas could always make her feel a certain way that she couldn't control.

"Maya… Do you like me?"

" _No_." She snapped. "And if you really think that I _care_ about you then you clearly need to get your head—"

She never got to finish her sentence.

Because Lucas leaned down and claimed her lips, silencing anything else she had to say. Maya gasped into his mouth, her words stolen from her lips as he kissed her with a hungry urgency.

It didn't take her long to reciprocate.

She moaned and slid her hands up his chest, wrapping her arms around his neck as she grew delirious from the intoxicating kiss. He backed her up against the edge of the pool table, leaning her backwards onto it, the wood creaking from the weight settling on it. Maya tugged him down on top of her, her flailing legs hooking around his waist as they heavily made out. His hands trailed down the skin of her waist, leaving goosebumps in their wake as he kissed her senseless. She threaded her fingers into his hair, her mind spinning from the intensity of his kiss.

It was like all the tension had culminated into this one moment, exploding into the air, bursting, burning her as if hot fire.

She whimpered as he dragged his lips down to her neck, leaving a trail of hot kisses on the skin as his hands travelled down. He gripped her ass, pulling her closer to him.

And when he ground against her, they both froze, their bubble of lust bursting and bringing them back to reality.

"L-Lucas…"

He pulled away from her neck, his eyes closed as he fought to control himself. Their eyes met as they stared at each other, chests heaving and bodies still sparking with electricity. Maya swallowed thickly, trying to fight the urge to pull him down and kiss him again.

"We should…" Lucas shook his head slightly, forcing his gaze off of her lips and back to her eyes. "We should probably head back before the others worry."

Maya nodded, slowly unlatching her legs from around Lucas as she tried to bring her mind back from its uncontrollable dizziness. His fingers lingered on her skin as he pulled away, but he finally let her go, readjusting his pants to try to conceal his obvious arousal. She stood up and straightened her own clothing as Lucas took a step back from her, keeping her gaze on the ground because she was scared that if she looked at Lucas again, she wasn't going to be able to control herself.

She wasn't sure at all what that was that happened between them just then, but she followed him out of the room and back inside, trying to act nonchalant and not like she and Lucas had just made out not one minute ago.

They walked back to their table where Zay was chilling with Vanessa, feeding her French fries. Riley was also sitting at the table, spinning her straw in her soda and looking bored. As they approached, Riley and Zay stared at them.

"Where did you guys go?" Riley asked suspiciously.

"We were just outside talking." Maya said, pretending to readjust her top to make sure the bottom of her bra wasn't showing if only to avoid Riley's questioning gaze.

"I didn't realize that people got so flustered and red faced when they… _talked_." Zay chuckled mischievously, staring at Maya with a shrewd gleam in his eyes.

Maya reached forward and flicked Zay on the forehead, threatening real bodily harm if he didn't cut it out, but as she pulled back, she caught a brief glimpse of Riley's expression before Riley rectified it and asked Vanessa something about Austin with a bright smile.

Though the expression had been generally unreadable, something about it set Maya on edge. It had been a little shaded, Riley's lips turned down in something like a frown. She just knew Riley was not particularly pleased.

And she was proven right when Riley didn't talk to her for the rest of the evening.

~.~.~

"Riley…" Maya asked as soon as Riley came back from brushing her teeth and walked inside their shared guest bedroom, "Why are you ignoring me?"

She was exhausted from the evening and she just wanted to curl up under her quilt and let it suck her into the abyss of the dreamscape. But Riley was mad at her, and for some reason, Maya knew if this wasn't fixed immediately, there would be much worse issues later.

"I'm not ignoring you…"

"Yes you are… You didn't say a word to me the whole way back. You haven't spoken to me since we were at Wild Horse."

"It's not like you needed me to talk to you." Riley shrugged nonchalantly. "You seemed to have had a _great_ conversation with Lucas outside."

Maya's eyes narrowed as she stared at Riley. She was being passive aggressive. Clearly, she was still bothered about it.

"So this is about Lucas then?"

Riley shrugged again, peeling back the covers of her bed and sitting on the edge of it.

"What's your deal?"

"Nothing… I just find it interesting how you decided you weren't going to speak to Lucas again and then all of a sudden you guys are best friends again after disappearing for like five minutes."

"What? I can't be friends with Lucas?" Maya scoffed incredulously, "Riley, can you seriously stop with the cryptic bullshit and just tell me straight up why you're mad at me?"

"Fine." Riley's jaw set as she met Maya's gaze steadily. "I ended my unofficial thing with Lucas for good this afternoon, Maya."

"I know. I was there when it happened."

"Yes, but I did it so that _you_ wouldn't have to be upset seeing me in a relationship with him since you like him too. But just because I told him we were friends does not mean I don't still have feelings for him." Riley frowned, speaking slowly, "So just like you seeing him with me would hurt you, me seeing him with you would hurt me. I _just_ officially broke up with him. I think it goes without saying that I would expect you to at least keep some distance to respect that."

Maya nervously licked her lips, staring down at her lap as Riley's gaze turned a bit shrewd. She'd broken girl code. She'd broken girl code big time, and she knew that wasn't okay in any setting.

"Did something happen between you and Lucas?" Riley asked suspiciously, her facial expression rather irate, "When you both disappeared?"

Maya met her gaze, intending to tell her the truth. Intending to reveal to her that they had kissed. But there was something about Riley's gaze that told Maya that if she told her what truly happened there would be bigger problems. That it wouldn't be so clear cut to mend that mistake she'd made. That Riley wouldn't be so quick to let it go. That their friendship would suffer.

And so, for the first time, Maya lied to Riley.

"No Riley. Nothing happened." Maya said easily, "I promise we just talked. We cleared the air over the bull thing."

Riley blinked, staring at her for a moment. Then her lips curved up into a pleased smile tinged with relief. And Maya automatically felt like shit for lying to her.

"Nothing happened at all? You guys did look a little flustered."

"Seriously, nothing happened. Zay was just being a little shit as usual." Maya's brows furrowed. "But you know what? Why would you tell Lucas that I liked him if you didn't want anything to happen, Riley? And I'm not okay with that. It wasn't your secret to tell, nor should you have mentioned it at all since I decided to keep it in the first place."

"Sorry. I was just trying to help him understand why you couldn't watch him ride the bull so that you guys wouldn't have a messed up friendship from the fact that you left." Riley looked at the cuckoo clock on the wall briefly before her gaze went back to Maya's a bit apprehensively. "Did Lucas bring it up when you talked? Did he respond to the confession?"

"No." Maya lied again. "I don't think he believed you that I liked him anyway."

"Okay. Look Maya. I don't want to get into a fight with you over Lucas. I don't want us to fight over him at all." Riley leaned forward. "So let's make a pact. A pact that neither of us will go after Lucas or try to be in a relationship with him or do anything with him because it will hurt us both in our friendship since we both like him. It's the only way to make it fair."

"Alright." Maya agreed, though her mind was replaying the kiss she'd had with Lucas.

"So no relationships with Lucas?" Riley held out her pinky.

"No relationships with Lucas." Maya nodded, hooking her pinky to Riley's.

They shook on it before returning to their respective beds to sleep. Tomorrow would be their last day in Austin, and they all intended to visit as much of the city as they could so they needed their rest.

Maya tossed and turned the majority of the night though, her mind wracked with guilt for not only lying to Riley, but agreeing to a pact that she had no business agreeing to when she'd already broken it before it was enacted.

But she knew the pact was the best way to prevent either of them getting hurt. Especially by the other. And she intended to honour it. Even if she screwed up that night, she wasn't going to make any more mistakes. She was going to uphold this pact no matter what. She owed Riley that much for breaking girl code and kissing her recent, official ex.

That was what she decided.

But that was not how it played out.

~.~.~

The last day and night of the trip had been wild. They went to so many events around the city and when night had fallen, had gotten some homemade ice cream from a creamery before sitting in a field and watching the stars. Zay had gotten wind of a real hoedown at a farm a little north of the city from Vanessa, so they'd gone to that as well.

It had been outrageously fun.

And Maya and Riley had been closer than ever, dancing together pretty much the whole time and enjoying themselves. Maya wasn't a fan of country music in the least, but even she couldn't deny that line dancing and square dancing with the entire crowd of people had been incredibly fun. It had honestly been the perfect end to a perfect mini vacation, despite the rocky start. And aside from a few lingering glances between her and Lucas, things had been pretty chill and they'd been able to talk relatively normally.

When the crew had gotten back to Pappy Joe's, they'd cut the lights off in his large sitting room in the back, lit up the fireplace, and made S'mores while just talking about life and what they expected for the rest of senior year in general. It was kind of bittersweet, thinking about all their changing futures, but thankfully, they had Riley's ever optimistic warbling to help keep them from getting melancholic.

But in the end, everyone else had gone to bed, exhausted from the events of the day and wanting sleep.

Everyone except for Lucas and Maya, that is.

Maya was way too hyper from the adrenaline from the hoedown to possibly consider sleeping now, and Lucas was just used to sleeping late too many days that his body wasn't tired. He had been braiding her hair absentmindedly while they bickered about the best kind of alcohol to mix with certain drinks when he suddenly asked her if she'd ever tried real homemade moonshine before.

Of course she hadn't, so Lucas had snuck away to the fridge in the basement, snatching up less than a shot's worth of Pappy Joe's special and very potent liquor.

"Alright try this." Lucas said, sitting down next to her and handing the shot glass to her, "Be careful. It's pretty strong stuff."

Maya gave him a dry look and a snort before bringing it up to her nose and taking a whiff. She blinked in surprise, clearing her throat when it burned her nose and the back of her eyes.

"Holy shit… Is this stuff going to tear my esophagus to pieces?"

"It might." Lucas chuckled. "You want something to chase it down with?"

"Nah, man." Maya waved him off. "I got this."

Maya knocked it back quickly, letting it slide straight down her throat without touching her tongue for very long. She swallowed it all at once, frowning when she didn't feel anything as it went down fairly smoothly.

"I don't feel anything…"

"Wait for it."

Fire suddenly erupted in her stomach and traveled up through her throat and the back of her mouth and tongue, so sharp and scalding that for a second, she thought if she opened her mouth, _fire_ would spew out. Maya wheezed, whacking at her chest as she coughed uncontrollably. It hadn't even been a full shot. Not even _half_ a shot, and it still burned so badly. She regretted not asking for something to chase it down with.

" _Fuck shit!_ What the hell?! That was _poison_!"

"Right?" Lucas laughed, rubbing Maya's back as she rubbed her throat and coughed to try to relieve it of the pain. "Pappy Joe can drink the stuff like water."

"I have a newfound respect for your grandfather." Maya said with a sigh of relief when the burning finally subsided, leaning against Lucas and laying her head on his shoulder as she tried to catch her breath. "Anyone who can stomach that shit is a badass in my books."

Lucas said nothing, staring out at the fire as they sat there, partially cuddled against each other. And Maya knew there had been a shift in the atmosphere. Something restless. Suddenly, she grew a bit anxious.

"Maya…" Lucas said softly, breaking the silence, "We need to talk about that kiss."

Maya stiffened slightly, sitting up and turning a bit away from him.

"There's nothing to talk about Lucas. We kissed. That's it." Maya shrugged. "Friends kiss all the time. It's not that big a deal. We were both pissed off and we—"

"Stop with that bullshit." Lucas cut in, a brow raised. "That wasn't a kiss between friends, and you know it. Do you like me, Maya?"

"Why are you asking that again?" Maya rolled her eyes.

"Because you never gave me a clear answer. You said no and then you kissed me back like you wanted me to fuck you on that pool table."

Maya's cheeks burned red at Lucas' words but she didn't respond, keeping her gaze trained diligently on the fire dancing behind the metal grate. She wouldn't answer. She _couldn't_ answer. Especially not after making that pact with Riley.

But Lucas had other plans.

He leaned closer to her, pressing his lips against her ear as he spoke deliberately low.

"Maya… Stop trying to run from me. Or I'll tickle you."

Maya snorted and rolled her eyes.

"No you—"

Lucas' fingers were attacking her sides before she even finished her statement, and Maya burst out into shrieks of laughter, her legs kicking wildly and arms flailing. She tried to get to her knees to escape him, but he pulled her back, and Maya tumbled onto the carpet, sprawled all over the floor as Lucas loomed over her, making her squeal as he continued his onslaught.

"Lucas!" Maya said, gasping for breath, "Stop! You'll wake everyone up!"

"You mean you will. You're the one who's laughing." He responded as he stared down at her, though he stopped wedging his fingers into her side. "So now that that's over with, answer my question. Or I'll tickle you again."

She stared up at him silently, her breath hitching from the heat in his gaze. She shook her head slowly, her eyes wide as she held her breath in anticipation. Lucas leaned down slowly, eyes on hers, barely touching his lips to hers.

"Tell me you like me…" he murmured against her lips.

"I…"

His hand gently caressed the skin of her waist from where her shirt had ridden up. A flash of heat ran through her body, and she trembled from his touch.

"Maya. Do you like me?"

She released a shuddering breath, mentally apologizing to Riley. Because she couldn't hold back any longer.

"Of course I like you, Huckleberry." she said, knowing her cheeks were turning red as she gazed up into his warm, dancing sea foam coloured eyes, "You're a great guy."

"Was that so hard to admit?" He smirked.

Then he leaned down again and closed the distance between their lips in a heated kiss that made Maya lose her breath. She reached up and draped her arms over his back, matching his fervent kisses as he shifted and settling above her, his hips between her spread legs. Her body was growing hot with want—with need—and Maya whimpered softly when Lucas' tongue slipped past her lips, tangling with hers as the intensity of their kiss grew.

Her legs hooked around his waist of their own accord, and she moaned as he slowly ground against her, heat pooling in her core. She could feel Lucas' arousal pushing persistently against her, and Maya knew she was turned on beyond what was normal for her.

She wanted it. She'd never wanted it more.

But it was one thing to kiss Lucas, one of her closest friends.

And it was a whole other to have sex with him.

Such a thing would undoubtedly change things between them, and Maya honestly wasn't sure if that would be a good or bad thing.

"Lucas…" Her breath caught when he ground against her again. "Lucas wait… We can't…"

"Maya I know what this is…" he said lowly, his hand trailing down and slipping underneath the hem of her shirt, "You're scared of what's going to happen if we do this. But I want to let this happen. I've been thinking about you nonstop since I first moved here. I've wanted to have you for years. I settled for Riley through these years because I never thought you were interested. I never thought I had a chance with you. If you tell me you really don't want us to go that far, I'll stop. But I don't want you to be a 'what if'. I don't want you to be a regret for something I didn't have the courage to try for. I lost that chance before when I met you and you slipped away. I won't lose it again."

Maybe it was that jumpstart she'd gotten from the moonshine. Maybe it was the intoxicating way with which he was sucking her neck, placing hot openmouthed kisses along the sensitive skin. Maybe it was the way his hand was under her bra, caressing one of her breasts. Maybe it was the way his erection was pressing against her, making her wet from the sensation.

Maybe, if she really stopped to think about it, it was her elation that for once, she'd been the first choice. She'd been wanted all along. That something good was happening to her for once.

She made her choice.

Didn't stop it as their clothes came off, tossed to different areas of the room.

Didn't stop Lucas' slow descent down her body, kissing her skin, sucking it, caressing her as her body quivered in anticipation.

Didn't stop Lucas when he lifted her hips, his mouth and tongue igniting a fire between her legs as he slowly drove her insane.

Didn't stop it when they officially broke the barrier between just friends and something unknown.

Maybe she was a terrible friend for breaking a promise to Riley, but as she tried to tame her cries of pleasure into his shoulder, her back arched sharply from the hypnotic, insistent rhythm stealing her breath, she couldn't care less.

It was wild. It was pure heat and fire, sweat dripping from their naked skin as Lucas growled, gripping her thighs so hard he left bruises. Maya's breaths became shallow, coming out in shorter and shorter pants, her head thrown back against the carpet, nails digging into his hips, driving him forward as ripples of pleasure surged through her.

The earth shattering intensity of their release was something she knew she would never forget. For a moment, they breathed as one, Lucas letting out a long, strangled groan as she screamed silently against his throat as they were seized by a rush of sensation so intense they couldn't catch their breath long after they'd fallen down from their high.

But they ultimately decided for the good of their group and for the good of their relationship, to never talk about it again. They cleaned themselves up and the area and dressed and went off to bed.

And the next day they acted like nothing happened.

It was never to be brought up. Never to be talked about. It would be Maya's dirty little secret for the rest of her life.

And she promised herself this would be the last time she broke the pact.

~.~.~

After the group returned to NYC, life pretty much went back to normal. Or as normal as normal could get knowing that she'd slept with Lucas and couldn't tell anyone. She and Lucas were a bit awkward, the air between them too charged and speaking became a difficulty. She kept seeing Lucas naked. And she knew he was seeing the same thing too, as when she had chosen to wear a crop top to school, he hadn't been able to keep his eyes off of her body.

But Maya would not act upon her desire for him to be in her once again. It was bad enough that they'd slept together and Maya had broken something important between her and Riley and was now keeping this secret.

But worse was that Maya _knew_ Riley was still really pining over Lucas. She knew Riley was hoping Lucas would come to her and ask her to restart their relationship and give things another try.

Maya could see it in Riley's eyes, the excitement that would show up when Lucas would talk to Riley and smile in that charming way he did that made girls swoon. The slightly triumphant tone Riley's voice would take when she would tell Maya that Lucas was coming over to hang out and watch a basketball game.

It was funny.

For wanting to enact a pact so badly for neither of them to be with Lucas, Riley sure seemed to be trying to spend a lot more time with him than was normal for friends.

When Maya asked her if she was trying to start another relationship with Lucas, Riley laughed it off and said they were just friends and just hanging out as friends.

It didn't breed much confidence though.

And honestly, Maya felt like Riley was going to win him back. That Lucas would try to go back with Riley now that he'd gotten what he wanted from Maya. He'd said it himself. He'd always wanted to fuck Maya, but now that she'd let him, was he even interested anymore?

It hurt her to admit it, but she couldn't help but feel like she had been used.

People didn't stay for Maya Hart.

They used her to get to Riley, who was considered the top prize.

And as she ignored Lucas in the hall that afternoon, she forced herself not to believe that the confused and slightly annoyed look he gave her for her dismissal meant anything.

~.~.~

But he proved her wrong when one evening, he suddenly showed up at her window, telling her he was fed up with the silent treatment she'd been giving him.

He was pissed that she'd been ignoring him.

She accused him of using her.

He showed her he was not by kissing her breathless.

It hadn't taken long for them to shed their clothes and tumble onto Maya's bed, their bodies entangled and limbs irrevocably intertwined, harsh grunts and breathy moans filling the air as they brought each other to unbelievable new heights of passion.

She told him it could never happen again; he told her it was only a matter of time until it did.

And he was right.

It happened again.

And again.

In his car.

And again.

In the janitor's closet at school.

And again.

In the bathroom of a pizzeria when she couldn't keep her feet to herself.

And again.

Each time more risky than the last.

Each time bringing them closer to a raging fire between them and an unrecognizable connection Maya knew they wouldn't be able to back away from if they didn't stop.

But despite that, they _didn't_ stop.

They became even closer. More playful with each other. More at ease. More lingering glances and flirtatious looks. More touching and physical contact.

Maya knew they had become closer because Riley often times would glance at them with furrowed brows or scowls, her lips turned down in a frown. She grew suspicious, a little jaded that Lucas had blown her off multiple times to hang out, always saying he was going to study with Maya.

Maya had a feeling that somehow, for some unexplainable reason, Zay knew what was going on with the two of them. Thankfully he stayed quiet. He never made suggestive comments when Lucas declined Riley's invitations because he was "studying" with Maya, but she would catch him giving them knowing looks or smirks.

Maya would always assure Riley that she and Lucas had nothing between them to try to appease Riley's fears.

She would spend the afternoon in Lucas' room feeling guilty because Maya knew that in Riley's diary, she had hoped that Lucas could be her first one day and that they could share a special moment together. Riley had hopes and dreams of losing her virginity to Lucas when she was ready.

And all the while, Maya was on her hands and knees on Lucas' bed, headboard banging against the wall, screaming into his pillow in ecstasy as he took her from behind.

~.~.~

They almost got caught sometimes.

Once by Maya's mother when Lucas was trying to sneak out of her window, but he'd tripped and knocked over the mini Christmas tree Katy had unexpectedly put outside Maya's fire escape window. Thankfully, Lucas had hightailed it the hell out of there and when Katy barged into Maya's room with a bat, Maya blamed the wind.

Once by Smackle when they'd been in the school parking lot skipping class and trying to get a quickie in and Smackle had shown up late that day. She could have sworn she saw Lucas with some blonde girl in the backseat of his car, but they'd managed to convince her she had been seeing things, though they weren't sure how successful they were seeing as how Smackle gave them odd looks every once in a while.

They almost get caught by Farkle too at his huge Secret Santa party.

Maya had seen Riley approach Lucas with mistletoe and grown annoyed with them both when he gave her a kiss on the cheek, right by the corner of her lips. Maya had avoided Lucas all evening after that, instead playing darts with Sarah and Jade or debating with Darby and Yindra the merits of alcohol spiked eggnog or staring in shock as her mom _successfully_ flirted with Shawn Hunter all night.

Though she wouldn't lie. Seeing her mother give him come hither, suggestive looks was utterly frightening and vomit inducing.

It wasn't until she was headed to the coat closet to grab her gift and put it under the tree that Lucas cornered her under mistletoe in the hallway with a rather naughty look on his face. A (fairly) innocent mistletoe kiss on her lips that should have stopped there ended with them immersed in the coats against the wall in the coat closet, desperately trying to find release. Maybe it had been the adrenaline or the danger of being caught, but they couldn't stop, even when Farkle walked inside to search for a coat, and Lucas had to slap a hand over Maya's mouth before they were discovered as a moan was dragged from her lips when he shifted his hips and white light danced in her vision.

They walked out of the closet several minutes later, satisfied and clothes and hair slightly rumpled, and Lucas pinched her butt on their way back to join the festivities.

"Stop touching me. You'll make it obvious what we just did." Maya slapped his arm before giving him a stern look. "This is starting to be dangerous. Farkle was _this_ close to finding us."

"Who cares?"

"I care." Maya hissed, glancing into the parlor where the rest of the people were celebrating, "Because every time we do this, we get closer to being caught. And I don't want to get caught, okay?"

Lucas frowned. "You know, I don't understand what the big deal is if we do get caught. Wouldn't it be easier for us if people already knew we were together?"

"No." Maya snapped, grabbing his sleeve and yanking him away from the entrance, "No one can know what we're doing, got that? And we are not 'together'. We like each other, and we have regular sex but that's it. We are _not_ in a relationship."

"Oh really." His eyes narrowed in annoyance. "So this thing between us. It's just you using me?"

"I'm not using you…" Maya averted her gaze, staring at the ground. "I know you really want this to be real… but I can't."

"Why not?"

Because Riley liked him too. Because Maya had made a pact.

Because if word came out that she was sleeping with Lucas and Riley found out, their friendship was as good as gone.

Maya didn't respond and Lucas sighed, taking hold of her waist and pulling her close to him. Maya fought the urge to inhale Lucas' amazing scent deeply.

"Hey." Lucas murmured, tucking a strand of hair behind her ear, "I don't know what's going on with you, or why you're being so reserved. I'm not going to force you to reveal it. But until then, I don't want to continue this thing if it means sneaking around like this all the time. I don't want to keep hiding what we have with each other as if we're some dirty little secret."

"Seriously?" Maya said in annoyance, "It's not like it's that serious."

"It's been two weeks, Maya. This isn't just a game to me. I want to be with you, but clearly you have other ideas." His eyes narrowed. "Let me know when you finally want to take what we have seriously."

"Lucas…"

He let go of her abruptly and walked inside the parlor. Maya stood outside the entrance for a moment, running her hand through her hair and trying to tamper down her racing heart. When she'd found some semblance of control over herself, she walked inside. Her eyes briefly met Lucas' near the tree, chatting with Billy and some other guys on the baseball team, but he turned away. So Maya turned away as well.

As Maya grabbed a cup to pour some eggnog in, Riley approached her.

"You were gone for a while. So was Lucas." she said innocently enough, "Where'd you guys disappear off to for so long?"

A quick glance in Riley's direction confirmed to Maya that Riley had a suspicious gleam in her eyes. She looked a little put off as she stared at Maya.

"Nowhere really." Maya took a nonchalant sip of the drink and hoped her eyes wouldn't reveal what had happened. "We went to explore some of the rooms of the house."

"Oh. It's just that Lucas kind of seems mad at you."

"I made a joke about him that he didn't like." Maya said dismissively.

Riley frowned. "You shouldn't make fun of him so much, Maya."

"Yeah…" Maya said boredly, her gaze drifting over to Lucas.

Their eyes met briefly again and then they both turned away, Maya's heart squeezing momentarily in her chest.

~.~.~

For a week, she and Lucas didn't convene again. They barely spoke and when they did, their conversations were generally clipped with insults flying within a few seconds. No one in their friend group knew why they were suddenly at each other's throats, and it made things particularly awkward when everyone hung out together. But Maya was still irritated with him. And he clearly was irritated with her.

So when Riley's annual New Year's Eve party came around, it was no surprise that they still weren't on speaking terms.

What _was_ a surprise to Maya was that Lucas and Riley were practically tethered at the hip the entire night. He spent almost all his time with her. Chatting with her. Laughing with her. Refilling her drink. Complimenting her dress, her hair.

Riley was clearly elated by all the attention.

Maya was not.

As she stood there sipping some ale, she felt restless, her gaze always drifting over to the two of them conversing by the ledge, regardless of who Maya was speaking to, not paying attention at all to what conversations she might have been having.

She was jealous of the attention he was giving Riley. Irritated with Lucas for spending time with Riley. Annoyed when Riley would touch his shoulder or his arm. Frustrated when Lucas would give Riley that charming, princely smile that was so unlike him.

So when Josh made a surprise appearance at the rooftop party, Maya retaliated by spending all her time that evening with him. Once upon a time, she had wanted Josh to be her first. She'd wanted Josh to be with her romantically. She didn't feel that way anymore—no longer had that interest—but they were older now. There were less restrictive barriers between them, and it wasn't quite so much a taboo anymore. If she really wanted to, if they ever wanted to, they could honestly try a relationship. She felt like she had a shot now. Josh didn't make it known whether or not he was interested, but he flirted back with her easily. He was a little reserved, but he didn't reject her, matching her playful teasing with his own.

Even better was when she caught Lucas' gaze from across the roof, a distinct set to his jaw that she _knew_ to be jealousy. She'd seen it before. And she was happy to see it again.

Until midnight struck.

And Riley kissed Lucas as soon as the fireworks began.

And he let her.

So Maya grabbed Josh's collar and kissed him too, pressing him against the wall and nearly shoving her tongue down his throat. He stiffened, confused at first, but then he relaxed, his arms coming around her waist as he reciprocated with fervor. It was intense and definitely a hot makeout and one that Maya had dreamed about getting from her long time ex-crush in the past.

But she felt no sparks. No butterflies dancing in her stomach. No tingles between her legs. No chills running up and down her back. No elation at finally getting Josh's attention.

Everything just felt all wrong. And she felt bad for using Josh when she pulled away and his soft blue eyes were dazed and confused, a slight murkiness to them as he stared down at her as if seeing her for the first time. Some of her friends were staring at them in shock. Others were whooping and hollering and making lewd comments about pregnancy. Her mother was throwing her saucy, suggestive winks and shouting 'That's my girl! She got that promiscuity from me!' Riley was giggling to herself, not paying attention to anything around her and grinning up at Lucas with a bright eyed twinkle in her eyes and goofy smile to her lips.

And Lucas?

 _Livid_.

He was staring at them in shock, jaw slightly unhinged and a sharp glint in his eyes that made Maya know she had definitely succeeded in her retaliation.

Clearly, her actions seemed to have put some kind of thoughts in Josh's head as well because he asked her if she wanted to head to another party with him at NYU later, a slight heat to his eyes that Maya knew was really an invitation for them to sleep together.

She didn't know if he honest to goodness wanted to spend more time with her or if he was just a little turned on from her kiss because of his buzz, but Maya did know for sure that she had no interest in anything happening between them whatsoever.

Maya rejected the offer.

She suddenly didn't feel any better about what she had done. Not even when Lucas spent most of the rest of the fireworks sulking, glowering at the two of them.

Maya felt sick to her stomach. She felt horrible and disgusting and _dirty_ and her mind kept replaying the way Riley had eagerly pressed her lips to Lucas'.

The way Lucas hadn't pushed her away.

She left the Matthews party before the fireworks had ended and the dancing and raging had even begun much to Josh's confusion. And Lucas decided to walk her home much to Riley's befuddled disdain.

Maya didn't say a word to him the whole way back. He didn't say a word to her. They walked with their hands shoved into the pockets of their coats, furious scowls on their faces, about a whole human sized space between them.

But behind the closed doors of her bedroom, it was a different story.

"So how long have you been sleeping with Josh?" Lucas spat cruelly, "Did you hop right into bed with him the minute we stopped? Or was it while we were together?"

"I've never slept with him, thank you very much, you asshole. And you are in no position to be getting mad at me. What happened to _I want to be with you_?" She sneered, glaring up at him. "You dare spout that bullshit to me and then kiss Riley a week later?!"

" _She_ kissed _me_ , okay?" Lucas snapped, "And I don't know why you're getting so mad when you kissed Josh!"

"Yeah, I kissed him to get back at you for kissing Riley!"

"I didn't kiss Riley though!"

"But you let her kiss you! You could have easily stopped it."

"Well you could have easily stopped flirting with Josh."

"So you let Riley kiss you because I was flirting with Josh? Seriously?" Maya glared up at him incredulously. "You're mad at me for flirting with Josh when you ignored me and spent the entire evening with Riley?"

"Jealous?"

"You were too!" Maya snarled, stepping closer to him and jabbing a finger in his chest. "And you're an asshole for using Riley to try to make me jealous."

"You're a bitch for using Josh to try to make me jealous too." Lucas replied, his eyes flaring with heat.

They fell silent, their breathing harsh and shallow as they glared at each other. Maya felt hot, her body prickling and goosebumps rising on her skin from the look in Lucas' eyes. She licked her lips, a flash of heat shooting to her core when his gaze dropped to her mouth.

"Fuck…" Lucas growled in a husky tone, grabbing her waist and pulling her flush against him. "I don't think I've ever wanted you more in my life…"

"Shut the fuck up and kiss me." Maya breathed out.

And that was all it took for their lips to crash together, tongues tangling, battling for dominance as they grasped each other, gripped each other, ran their hands all over each other. He pinned her against the wall and hoisted her up. She wrapped her legs around his waist as he ripped her tights and tore away her panties.

Maya didn't realize how much she'd been missing this for a whole week now that she had it again.

They caressed each other, apologizing with their lips. Apologizing with their hands and their bodies, reaffirming to each other that what they wanted was each other.

It was frantic. Intense. It left Maya gasping for breath, crying out, her head thrown back against the wall as she dug her nails into Lucas' shoulders. Her heart was pounding wildly in her chest.

It built and the pressure mounted and mounted until she couldn't take it anymore. Until she was a trembling, quivering mess, hot white lightning shooting through her body as Lucas murmured sweet nothings into her ear.

And as they crashed back down to Earth after reaching that pinnacle of pleasure, Maya didn't think it could get any better than this.

Lucas spent the whole night in her room with her, and they made up for lost time and once again confirming to each other that they both wanted this. That they still both wanted each other.

By the time daylight broke through her window, they were laying in her bed, cuddled up together and breathing hard, spent, exhausted, and fighting to regain their lost breath.

"Lucas… Listen." Maya muttered drowsily. "I'm not ready to be in a real relationship with you yet. I can't be. Not yet. But that doesn't mean I don't want to be with you."

He didn't respond for several seconds, and Maya thought that she'd probably just ruined everything between them again.

But then he sighed, his arms tightening around her torso as he pulled her tighter to his body.

"Fine. I get it. It's annoying, but I get it…" he said softly, "I'll wait for you to be ready, Maya. I'll wait until you're ready for us to be an official couple. But please just don't kiss any other guys. I was two seconds from losing it and tossing Josh over the ledge."

"Same goes for you about kissing anyone else, or I'm kicking your ass."

Lucas chuckled and then kissed the back of her neck, before sliding a leg between her own as their eyes began to droop shut and they settled into a deep slumber.

In that one moment, basking in the afterglow as she let herself succumb to her fatigue, Maya didn't think about Riley. She didn't think about what Riley wanted. She didn't think about the pact or the fact that she was carrying out a relationship with Lucas. All she thought about was her own happiness.

And she was.

For once, she was truly happy.

~.~.~

Maya didn't expect anyone to ask her to prom. She hadn't gone with anyone junior year and she doubted there would be anyone willing to take her this year. And as the date slowly approached, Maya resigned herself to the fact that she would be going stag again this year. But she wasn't too bothered by it. It had always been that way for any dances or semi formals through the years. Riley always had a date because she got asked by many people since she was more likeable, not scary, and very cute. Maya just didn't.

So Maya wasn't at all surprised she still hadn't gotten asked the week of.

Riley had gotten asked by several people now that many of them had a feeling she and Lucas weren't in any type of unofficial thing anymore. She'd rejected pretty much all of them though. She didn't tell Maya why, but Maya had a feeling it was because Riley was hoping Lucas would ask her. It wasn't that Riley was trying to make it obvious or anything, but ever since the New Year's kiss, it was pretty clear to Maya that Riley was hoping her relationship with Lucas would recommence.

"Do you know if Lucas has asked anyone yet?" Riley asked curiously during locker break, twiddling her thumbs. "Like, have you heard any news from anyone about whether he's going to ask anyone? I asked him if he was planning on asking someone, and he said he was working on it."

Maya rolled her eyes, her face hidden from Riley's view as she switched out her textbooks for her next chunk of classes.

"I don't know, Riley. Billy said something about the entire baseball team being involved though."

And then Riley gasped dramatically.

Maya pulled her head out of her locker in alarm, her gaze going to where Riley was looking.

Coming down the hall was the entire baseball team, varsity and JV, led by a smirking Lucas walking confidently towards the two girls. They were all singing some country ass song, dancing some line dance down the hallway as they approached.

And they were dressed in full cowboy getup, from the gallon hats and plaid shirts to the jeans and cowboy boots.

They were causing a disturbance in the hallway and making a lot of noise and a crowd began to gather, around them all, clapping along and cheering.

"This here song and dance goes to a very special lady." Billy sang in an exaggerated country accent as the group filed into a small semi-circle formation around the two of them.

"A very special lady indeed." Brent added.

"And who's that special lady?" Alex continued.

"Maya Hart." Lucas said, also in an exaggerated country accent, stepping away from the square dancing group of guys with another gallon hat in his hand. He dropped it on her head and then tugged her forward by the wrist, pulling her into the mass of boys despite her protests. "I heard that you hadn't been asked to prom yet. So I'm here to make that wish come true."

"Oh my God, stop." Maya laughed as he do si do'ed in a circle around her, a smirk on his lips. "What the hell are you doing, Ranger Rick?"

"Maya," he said in his normal voice, "I know I'm late, and I'm sorry for waiting until the very last minute to ask you, but I wanted this to be perfectly annoying for you."

"You succeeded."

It was the promposal that Maya knew Riley wished she could have gotten from Lucas. The one that Maya had gotten instead. The one that made Maya's pulse race and her heart dance in her chest as butterflies flipped in her stomach.

But as she watched Riley's face slowly fall, a deep hurt creeping into her gaze as her face settled into an undecipherable expression, Maya tampered down her joy. She rolled her eyes with a scoff, pretending to be disgusted.

"So darlin', will you do me the honour of being my date to prom?" Lucas asked Maya, stopping in front of her and taking off his cowboy hat and holding it to his chest when the boys finished the last note. The other boys formed a circle around the two of them, removing their hats in sync as well. "Please? I told pretty much every guy you were off limits, so if you say no, I might just cry."

She wanted to say no for Riley's sake. She wanted to reject his offer, but as she stared into those warm sea-foam coloured eyes, dancing in anticipation and drowning her in affection, she couldn't utter those words.

"You are such a fucking Huckleberry…" Maya laughed, shaking her head in mirth. "Yeah. I'll go with you."

"Yeeehaaaawwwww!" He shouted, putting his gallon hat back on his head with a wide grin.

"You're such a dork!"

He scooped her up in a tight hug, spinning her around happily as people in the hallway clapped and cheered.

Maya's gaze drifted to Riley momentarily, and she thought she saw a dark, hooded look in her eyes. But when she blinked, Riley's face was set in a gleeful smile, and she hopped up and down, giggling excitedly.

~.~.~

By definition, parties were great. And prom that year was fun.

In the end Riley ended up going with Charlie, someone who had apparently been interested in her for years, but never approached because of her thing with Lucas. But after Lucas asked Maya, it became officially known to the entire school that Riley and Lucas had totally and completely ended their thing.

Riley had been a little quiet at the picture party and the dinner, seemingly in a downtrodden mood, but by the middle of prom, she was the widely smiling goofball she usually was. She and Maya spent the majority of their time together since it was their last prom and they both decided they should spend as much time together as they possibly could.

It was fairly tame as far as a party went though, especially because of all the teacher and parent chaperones littering the floor. No students wanted to be _that_ person to get kicked out of prom and possibly school for spiking the punch nor did they want somebody's grandmother or parent seeing them grinding on each other.

The _real_ party was at the unchaperoned after party exclusive to seniors at Missy's dad's hotel's penthouse suite.

And a party it was.

It was every bit as wild, crazy, out of control, and full of drunk teens as Maya expected.

Riley wanted to spend the evening hanging out with Maya again, but Lucas pulled Maya to the dance floor, telling Riley that he was taking his date back.

They spent the whole night dancing with each other until they were both sweaty and breathing hard. His hands trailing down her sides as she ground against his erection. His lips on her neck, licking her and leaving little bites on her overheated skin as she threaded her fingers in his hair.

She didn't know when they ended up against the wall, but one second, they were dancing, the next, their lips were attached, tongues intertwined, her arms thrown around his neck as he teased the zipper of her dress.

It was humming with electricity, flames sparking between them as he held her body close to his, his gaze hooded and burning with a heat that made Maya's panties grow wet.

And she knew they had to leave.

Apparently, Lucas had already gotten them a hotel room in anticipation and stocked it with champagne and strawberries and whipped cream.

It didn't take long for them to near rip their clothes off of each other and fall into bed with one another.

And when he was inside her and her nails were raking down his back and she was crying out in ecstasy and Lucas was breathing heavily in her ear, the fingers of one hand intertwined and pressed against the mattress, it was like an out of body experience. It was more intense than anything they'd ever done before and when she came, her body quivering from her release, her heart lurched so strongly in her chest she couldn't catch her breath.

There was something about that evening. Something that had irrevocably changed things between them. Something that made Maya realize that what she felt for Lucas was much stronger than just like. She didn't know exactly where her feelings lied. She wasn't sure it was the L word quite yet, but she knew it was damn close.

They spent the rest of their night messing around, laughing and enjoying each other's company.

And Maya didn't think she could ask for a more perfect evening.

Riley texted her late in the evening asking where she and Lucas went and why they were MIA when their whole group was supposed to go get some late night food. Maya told her she was feeling ill so Lucas took her home and kept her company.

Riley didn't respond.

~.~.~

If Maya really looked back, she could trace back the beginning of the end of her friendship with Riley to the evening at Wild Horse when she had ignored her after she had suspected Maya and Lucas had kissed.

But back then to that point, the cracks hadn't shown since both girls had treaded on thin ice carefully, avoiding specific things that could open up the vulnerability in their friendship.

After prom, the cracks clearly became visible.

Riley grew even more suspicious and annoyed when yearbooks came out the week after prom, and Lucas and Maya won Hottest Couple for senior superlatives. Maya had assured her that it didn't mean anything and that it was just a joke by their graduating class, and even though Riley hadn't responded, Maya didn't realize just how deeply affected by it Riley was until Maya went over to her place after school and Riley was particularly hostile and unwelcoming, snapping at her for everything.

"So what exactly is the matter with you?" Maya asked, glaring at Riley, "Is this still about the stupid yearbook thing? I told you, it doesn't mean anything."

"But doesn't it though?" Riley's eyes narrowed. "Just what is your relationship with Lucas anyway, Maya?"

"Why are you acting like this? If you won the couple's superlative with Lucas, I wouldn't be accosting you like this."

"Of course you wouldn't be confronting me, because I wouldn't have broken the pact. I know you made out with Lucas at the prom after party. I saw you two."

Maya was momentarily stunned speechless, staring at Riley incredulously.

"Okay. Fine. I made out with him at the after party." Maya crossed her arms in front of her chest. "Do you seriously think you haven't done wrong, though? You broke the pact when you kissed him at the New Year's Eve party."

Riley stood up from the window indignantly. "You broke it first when you kissed him during Christmas! Zay saw you two, and I overheard him talking about it!"

" _You_ put _mistletoe_ between you guys at Christmas on purpose. You were obviously trying to get back together with him."

"At least I actually had a relationship with Lucas. Even if I broke the pact, it wouldn't have mattered because Lucas and I had a thing. I have a better chance of ending up with him than you."

Maya had to physically bite her tongue to stop from revealing that she'd been sleeping with Lucas for months and that they actually did have reciprocal feelings for each other. She had to stop herself from revealing that Lucas would rather have her than Riley.

"Oh yeah? If you so called had a thing with Lucas, then why isn't he trying to get back with you?"

"Because you're in the way! Why can't you just butt out so Lucas and I can have our relationship?"

Maya's eyes narrowed as she shot to her feet.

"Is that why you told him I liked him when we went to Texas? You were trying to get me out of the way!"

"So what if I was? You were always in the way even during our unofficial thing!" Riley shouted back. "Always hugging him and touching him and playing around with him! It bothered me!"

Topanga barged into the room before Maya could respond.

"Girls! Girls! Stop with this arguing!" She stood between them, her arms crossed as she glanced at them both. "What is going on in here?"

"Why don't you ask, Riley?" Maya spat. "She's the one who ousted my feelings in hopes that it would end anything between me and Lucas."

"Why don't you ask, Maya?" Riley snapped back. "She's the one who's been sabotaging me and Lucas since senior year started."

"Seriously? If anyone's been in the way and sabotaging, it's _you_."

"Okay, stop! Look, I don't know who started this or how this started, but you're both wrong, okay?!" Topanga intervened before another round of arguing could begin. "If this interest you both have in Lucas is causing a rift in your friendship, then you should honestly just stop trying to sabotage whatever this pact is that you made and stop the pact overall. Lucas is not some tug of war rope that you can pull to either side. He is a real human being with his own feelings. Think about that, girls. Now I want the fighting to stop, okay?"

Topanga left the room, and Riley and Maya glowered at each other, arms crossed in front of their chests.

"My mom is right. We should just end all pretenses with our old pact." Riley said sharply, "Why not just let Lucas choose? He picks whatever girl he wants and the other girl— _you_ —should bow out with no hard feelings."

"You know what?" Maya scoffed, shaking her head in disgust. "Fine. Let's let Lucas choose."

Riley would be in for a rude awakening. And quite frankly, Maya didn't care enough to stop her from getting hurt.

She stormed out of the Matthews' apartment, deciding she'd had enough of tampering down the happiness she felt with Lucas and the elation and the way their relationship was for the sake of Riley.

Maya was pissed off.

She'd done nothing but try to cater to Riley's desires and wants, even putting aside and diminishing her burgeoning relationship with and feelings for Lucas over the years and especially this year for the sake of her best friend.

Riley had no idea just how many sacrifices Maya had made for her since sophomore year, all for the sake of her happiness. She gave up Lucas for Riley, hid her feelings for years, pushed him to Riley, reminded him of Riley at every turn of the second, and even tried to convince herself that she and Lucas would never work because she was bad for him.

And even now, even though they were sleeping together, she wouldn't let it go past that despite how much she really liked him, all because she wanted Riley to be happy.

And it wasn't fair.

Why couldn't Riley just be happy for her for once? Why did good things only ever matter if Riley was the one who experienced them?

Maya had had enough.

Riley wanted to end all pretenses?

Fine.

Maya would do just that.

~.~.~

And end pretenses she did.

She let Lucas openly flirt with her and flirted back in the hallways. She let him be as touchy as he wanted, as relationship-y as he could get away with before she threatened to kick his ass. They spent a lot of time together, and honestly, Maya could easily say she really enjoyed not having to hide how close they truly were.

She and Riley were assigned as partners again for an in class history research project and for the first time ever since they declared themselves best friends on the kindergarten playground years ago, they rejected the pairing, asking for different partners.

Riley ended up paired with Farkle while Maya was assigned Lucas'.

Maya basically spent the entire class period goofing off loudly, Lucas' fingers playing with her hair and Maya drawing random stuff on his arms. They got kicked out of class for making too much noise, and she and Lucas spent their remaining time making out by the lockers, trying to see which one of them could rile the other up even more.

During lunch, Smackle pointed out the hickey on Maya's neck, and Riley stood up abruptly and left.

Maya didn't go after her.

And things with her and Riley slowly deteriorated even more as time went on.

Riley was snappier with her, ignoring her for extended periods of time and passive aggressive at all others. It got old very fast. And soon, Maya was responding just as snidely, just as sharply. She started to get short with her too and their usual exchanges were generally punctuated by an underlying resentment and irritation and malice that never used to exist between the two of them before.

It wasn't just shocking to Maya that this was what their relationship had been reduced to. The school body was also fairly shocked that Rilaya, the best and example friendship in the entire school, was no longer on good terms.

And Maya wondered when she and Riley had drifted so far apart. When they started to see each other as enemies in each other's world. When they lost sight of what made them best friends in the first place. When things changed. When she stopped wanting to sacrifice things for Riley.

Maya wondered when she started to grow tired of Riley.

It was kind of a strange, lonely feeling and when she asked her mom, Katy told her it wasn't because of the Lucas issue.

It was that they'd both grown up. That things had changed because they both had developed their own beliefs and desires that no longer meshed or lined up as well as they used to. That it was a natural part of senior year and growth and that after spending so many years together as extremely close best friends, that it wasn't something to worry about because it was a natural drift. That they would find their way to each other again in time. That she just had to be patient.

It honestly scared Maya a little because though she wished she were still close with Riley, she couldn't help but feel deep down like maybe it was for the best that they weren't close anymore.

And she had no idea what that would mean for their friendship.

Or when the drift back to each other her mother had mentioned would happen.

~.~.~

But it got worse.

Near the end of their last semester, Billy unexpectedly started dating Missy. Apparently they had accidentally slept together at the prom after party and had been in denial of their feelings for each other for weeks. But she became an unofficial member of their friend group.

And since Lucas and Billy often hung out together, naturally, Missy and Maya began to hang out too. And honestly, Maya didn't mind it that much. She never used to like Missy, but she wasn't too bad to chill with, plus, it was nice to have a girl friend who she could discuss inappropriate things with and crack sexual jokes with. Maya found a friend in Missy in a way she hadn't been able to with Riley because of Riley's distaste of a lot of rather adult topics. Missy was pretty mature, and they could have deeper conversations ranging from a wider array of topics.

But it wasn't that simple.

Riley didn't particularly get along great with Missy. They were just casual acquaintances at best and enemies at worst. And sometimes if Maya would be hanging out with Riley, they'd get in small arguments because Riley would mention something Missy said or did, essentially badmouthing her in Maya's opinion, and Maya would get a bit defensive.

The breaking point came when Missy gave Maya an invite to her exclusive upcoming last day of school senior bash, but not Riley.

Maya wanted to go.

Riley disagreed.

And they got into _another_ fight, Riley adamantly believing she should not go to the party because of loyalties to their friendship.

At least that was how it started.

It ended as a yelling match.

And not even about the party.

"What kind of friend are you? You have absolutely no loyalty to me whatsoever!"

"It's just a fucking party! What is wrong with you?! If I go, it doesn't make a damn difference! This has nothing to do with loyalties! I've been to other parties without you before and you didn't care!"

"Oh yeah, I bet loyalty doesn't make a damn difference to you!" Riley screamed, "That's probably the exact same thing you were thinking when you stole Lucas from me!"

Maya's eyes narrowed.

"So that's what this fight is really about. This isn't about me wanting to go to Missy's party. This is about your incessant inability to fucking realize that you and Lucas have been over since senior year started!"

"We have not been over! We could have continued our relationship if you hadn't sunken your claws into him at Christmas the minute he was available!"

"Get over it!"

"No! He was my boyfriend for _two years_ , Maya! I was in love with him, and you didn't have the decency to at least wait a longer period of time after we broke up for me to get over him before you tried to get with him!" Riley shouted.

"If you still had such strong feelings for him, you shouldn't have lied to him and told him you were over him then! And you shouldn't have tried to break _my_ relationship with Lucas by outing my feelings for him!" Maya yelled back, "The only reason you're really mad at me is because you're upset that your meddling had the opposite effect of what you wanted. You know that if you had kept your mouth shut then none of this would be happening right now. You brought this on yourself by sticking your nose in something that had nothing to do with you!"

"You broke girl code, Maya! That's not okay! You should have asked me first if it was okay for you to have a relationship with Lucas!"

"Oh grow up and stop being such a damn baby." Maya scoffed, rolling her eyes. "Have you ever even wondered _why_ Lucas isn't interested in you anymore or why Missy didn't bother inviting you? You're such a goody two shoes little miss perfect and control freak. You annoy everyone with your self-righteous rhetoric!"

"Get out!" Riley screamed, her eyes shining with unshed tears and red rimmed, "Get the hell out of my room!"

" _Gladly_."

Maya slammed Riley's door on her way out.

They had definitely left on uncertain terms but honestly, Maya just didn't feel it in her to even want to try to patch up their broken friendship. Maybe Maya _was_ wrong for getting with Lucas so quickly, maybe Riley had a serious point about the girl code, but Maya couldn't find it in herself to care.

She was tired.

She was tired of having to downplay her feelings and desires.

Tired of having to protect Riley's heart and shelter her from things.

Tired of giving up things and hiding things just because Riley wouldn't be okay with something.

It was her turn to take for once.

It was her turn to be selfish.

Even if it meant nailing the coffin on her so called friendship with Riley.

~.~.~

Riley refused to acknowledge her for the rest of the week. And Maya ignored Riley too.

And it seriously drove a wedge and a split in their friend group.

All of a sudden, half of them were hanging out with Maya and the other half with Riley, everyone completely unsure of who they were supposed to hang out with because they didn't even know the root of the fight. In the end, it went to who they were closer friends to in general.

But neither girl made any attempts to mend their friendship or try to hang out together anymore.

So Maya spent lunch in the art room, deciding she'd rather be by herself than anywhere near Riley and her little crony of goody goody friends. Which was why she was in the art room that afternoon, trying to figure out the best way to paint waves only using shades of blue when Farkle suddenly walked in, looking a little disappointed and annoyed.

"Maya, we need to talk."

She barely spared him a glance.

"About what Farks."

"You and Riley. You guys need to stop fighting like this. You're ruining our friend group. We only have a few weeks of school left, and I want us all to be able to hang out together before summer comes and then we all leave for college."

"So let me guess." Maya drawled, "You came here to ask me to apologize to Riley?"

"Yes, because you do need to apologize to her. I talked to Riley, you know? She told me what happened."

"Of course you'd take _her_ side." Maya scoffed with a roll of her eyes. "You're bred from the same boring goody goody gum drop tree."

"Of course I'm taking her side." Farkle growled, coming around the front of her easel so he was standing in front of her and she could see him. "It's not about you, Maya. This is about Riley and Lucas. It doesn't matter that you and Lucas have some unofficial thing. The problem here isn't your relationship with Lucas. The problem is that you broke Riley's trust after she asked you not to try to be with Lucas and all of a sudden you two are giving each other hickeys during school. You hurt her, Maya. You shouldn't have done that. You shouldn't have taken Lucas from Riley when she still loves him."

And all of a sudden, white hot rage flew through Maya's body, her breathing harshening as she slammed her paintbrush back onto the holder of the easel. Her stool scraped loudly and jarringly against the tiles of the floor as she shot up. Farkle looked a little surprised by her sudden motions, taking a small step back in alarm.

And Maya exploded.

"And what about _me_ , huh?! I give up everything for her. I give her everything I want! I always put myself second. Always let myself be second best just because I want her to be happy. When do I get the chance to finally be happy for me? How come I can't ever be number one? How come I can't ever be the successful one?! It's always Riley, Riley, Riley!" Maya didn't even realize she was crying until her vision blurred slightly with tears. "I finally have a chance with the guy I've had feelings for for _three years_ but I can't even have that because Riley's not okay. Did it ever even occur to you that _both_ Lucas and I like each other?! So what. Just because Riley's upset, we can't have anything between us until _she's_ okay? That's not fair, Farkle. Don't _our_ feelings count in this at all?! It's not always about Riley, you know?"

Farkle's eyes widened slowly, shock registering on his features as his scowl slowly loosened.

"But she can't take it if the world doesn't revolve around her. Nothing is okay unless _she's_ the only one who can be happy. And even now I can't even be happy because she's not fucking happy. Do you know how annoying that is?!" Maya angrily swiped at her eyes. "Riley has _everything_. I never get anything. _Ever_. So I want to be right for once. I want to be selfish and take what I want for once. And if taking what I want means Riley and I can no longer be friends, then so be it. Go ahead and tell _that_ to Riley, messenger boy. I'm not apologizing for shit. And if you can't see that, then I guess you and I are no longer friends either, Farkle."

Maya snatched up her bookbag and stormed out of the art room before he could get in another word.

~.~.~

After her little blow up at Farkle, Maya hadn't expected any kind of response. Based off of how immature Riley could be sometimes, she honestly expected her to ignore anything Maya had said to Farkle.

Which was why she was so surprised when the weekend after Maya's spat with Farkle, Riley showed up in her room, her lips pursed as she knocked on the doorframe. Maya had been dumbfounded, staring at Riley in slight shock, still wondering if it was for real that Riley had come to her.

"Look Maya. I thought about what we fought about and what you said to Farkle, and I decided to be the bigger man and apologize." Riley said without introduction. Maya's face twisted a bit from the slight arrogance to her tone. "I shouldn't have been so controlling. And maybe I _can_ loosen up a little bit, but it's just part of my personality and I shouldn't be faulted for being the way that I am. It hurts me that you would use my traits against me like that."

Maya ran her hand through her hair with a sigh. "Fine. I'm sorry about that. That was wrong of me."

"Thank you for the apology. I appreciate it." Riley said evenly, "And I decided I should be more honest and maybe should step out of my comfort zone a little bit more."

"…Is there a point to this, or…?" Maya said slowly, still a little wary about Riley's expression.

Even though she claimed she was apologizing, Maya could still see some sort of self-righteous indignation in her expression, and she wondered if she was honestly here because she wanted to be or because she had been forced.

"Maya. I think that instead of fighting over Lucas, we should both just give him up for now, and that's the only way things can go back to the way they were otherwise we'll keep fighting."

Maya rose a brow, giving Riley an incredulous look.

"No." She scoffed. "That's a _terrible_ idea, and I don't want to."

Riley bristled, taking a deep breath before letting it out through her nose slowly, her teeth clenched.

"Why not? Clearly if things keep going the way they have, we'll keep having these issues. So we should just stop with all the Lucas fighting, period. And the only way to do that is to go back to the way things were."

"You just want to go back to the 'way things were' because back then, you had an unofficial thing with Lucas and I didn't and you want to continue that. I don't think so. Stop trying to bullshit me. I can read your intentions like a book."

"I'm trying to fix things between us and compromise, but you're being so stubborn!"

"Maybe I don't want to compromise. Look, maybe you feel like we should both give up because things between you and Lucas are over." Riley's eyes briefly narrowed in irritation, but Maya continued anyway. "But I kind of have something with him now. And why should I give up just because your relationship with him is over?"

"A couple of kisses and hickeys don't count as _something_ Maya. You can easily stop it." Riley retorted sharply. "Are you seriously trying to continue something with Lucas even though you _know_ it's hurting me?"

Maya sighed under her breath, rolling her eyes to the sky and once again, having to bite her tongue to keep herself from revealing the truth of the nature of her relationship with Lucas.

"I'm not trying to be a terrible friend, but if you liked someone that I also liked and you were with him, I would let you enjoy the relationship. I wouldn't keep you from having it." Maya's eyes narrowed. "Oh wait. I _did_ do that. _For three years_. Can't you be happy for me?"

"Why don't you get that it's hard to be happy for you because I'm still in love with Lucas?! He wasn't just some random crush, you know? I thought he was going to be my one and only. I was going to give him my virginity. That's how deep my feelings for him were. And you _know_ I would never give up my virginity to anyone unless I truly loved them."

"You guys barely dated for the two years you were together. And when you did, it was awkward and uncomfortable. And he never made any efforts in your relationship when you had that unofficial thing." Maya asserted. "How can you even say you're in love with him when you don't even know him?"

"It was a feeling I got, okay? I just knew it when I was with him. You wouldn't understand." Riley snapped. "Look. The very least you could do is at least just put whatever thing you might have on halt with Lucas. Please? Can you at least wait until I'm no longer around and don't have to see it?"

Maya didn't want to. She still thought it was annoying that Riley was pushing for her to back off of Lucas, but Maya knew if she didn't agree, Riley would just keep pushing for it. And quite frankly, Maya didn't want to have to deal with it at the moment. But she could at the very least just tamper down the thing with Lucas. At least until they graduated. Riley would be going to Italy with her family, and Maya could spend time in the summer with Lucas the way she wanted to without being harassed.

"Fine." She grumbled.

Maya had honestly thought that conversation was what her mother had meant by the drift back to each other. The beginning of the mending of their friendship after the small row they'd had that split their group of friends.

But she had been dead fucking wrong.

~.~.~

Maya had honestly made up her mind to slow things down a bit with Lucas. There were only three weeks until graduation anyway. She could wait it out three weeks.

Or so she thought.

Lucas wasn't exactly in favour of cutting things cold turkey after they'd been so hot and heavy for a while. Though she resisted his advances, he made it pretty clear that he still wanted them to continue things the way they were going.

Especially when they were alone.

Maya and Lucas were in her room one evening, studying in preparation for their AP exam. It had been harmless, productive studying—honestly—with Lucas quizzing Maya on physics topics and making sure she understood the concepts. Then she'd made a mistake.

"Wrong answer, babe. Punishment time."

Before she could avoid it, Lucas had pounced on her, tickling her until she was gasping for breath and begging him to stop. When their laughter tapered away, he was on top of her, heat dancing in his warm gaze.

And Maya knew she wouldn't be able to stop anything that happened.

Not when she had such a strong pull towards Lucas. Not when the intensity of her feelings for him had skyrocketed so much that she could only think of one word when she thought of him. As she stared up at him. She saw the same look reciprocated in his eyes as he leaned down and captured her lips in a tender kiss.

Before she knew it, he was between her legs thrusting hard and fast, her skirt rucked up, his harsh grunts and breathing heavy against her neck as high pitched whimpers and long, strangled moans escaped her lips. Maya clung to him desperately, drowning in pleasure, ripples of pure bliss bursting through her trembling body as she grew lightheaded and dizzy. Her toes curled in pleasure as the pressure mounted and his motions grew more frenzied, more jerky. She knew they were so close. So close to absolute perfection and a blinding, soul shattering climax.

And then her door flung open…

And Riley walked in with a wide smile on her face.

They all froze, Lucas and Maya staring up at Riley in shock. Riley stared down at them silently, her smile slowly slipping from her face and eyes widening immeasurably as she took in the scene in front of her. Maya could see and hear something in Riley _shattering_ as she stared at them wide eyed. The sparkle in her cherry brown eyes slowly dulled, an empty look taking its place.

And she turned around without a word and fled.

Guilt crashed into Maya full force and harder than she had expected and she shoved Lucas off of her, scrambling to tug down her skirt as she stood up and ran after Riley.

"Riley! Riley, wait!"

Riley stopped in the middle of the living room, her back still facing Maya.

"How long?" she asked calmly, her voice shaking a bit.

A little too calmly.

"What?"

"How long have you really been with Lucas? This weekend? Was it since Christmas? I want to know the truth."

Maya clammed up, knowing if she told her the truth, Riley would be absolutely heartbroken. Riley would know that it had even been the same day as her official break up with Lucas. Maya could feel herself shaking a bit, chewing on her lower lip as her heart rate increased.

"Riley—"

"Tell me the truth! The whole truth!" Riley suddenly shouted, spinning around and fixing Maya with a sharp glare so full of disgust and loathing, things that Maya had never seen in Riley's eyes before. "You owe me at least that much for _lying_ to my face! How long have you been sleeping with Lucas?! When did you guys _really_ start being together?"

"It was…" Maya cleared her throat, meeting her gaze steadily. "It was the day you ended things officially with Lucas… At Wild Horse. We kissed Riley. And on the last day of the Texas trip, we slept together. And we've been sleeping with each other ever since."

Riley's eyes welled with tears as she shook her head slowly in disbelief.

"The… the whole time. All these months…" Riley's lower lip trembled. "You _betrayed_ me, Maya! You both did! You've been lying to my face every. Single. Day."

Maya felt Lucas' presence behind her and Riley turned her sharp glare on him.

"And _you_. I bet you were cheating on me the entire time we dated!"

"…Physically? No." Lucas answered honestly. "Emotionally? Yes. I'm sorry, Riley."

She closed her eyes briefly, taking in a shuddering breath as a soft sob left her lips.

"Riley, you can't fault Maya for this. I'm the one who decided that I wanted to be in a relationship with Maya." Lucas continued, "And I'm the one who was with you even though I had feelings for Maya. The truth is, I settled for you. And I used you on New Year's. Both times I led you on. And for that I'm sorry. You didn't deserve that at all."

"Apology not accepted." Riley snapped. "You're horrible. How could you do that to me? I wasted _years_ on you! I thought we were in love! You are not the person I thought you were."

"Riley." Lucas said, his voice sounding annoyed, "I _never_ was the person you thought I was. And that's why I could never be one hundred percent in our relationship. You never saw me as anything other than a Mr. Perfect."

"Lucas, stop. Stay out of this." Maya said, her eyes trained on Riley, "This is between me and Riley."

"Maya…"

"Please? Just go back to my room."

He sighed behind her, but patted her shoulder gently, walking back towards her room. Riley's angry glare went back to Maya, her teeth grit and clenched fists shaking the slightest bit.

"Riley…"

"I hate you, Maya." Riley spat venomously with narrowed eyes. "I really, really hate you right now."

It stung.

It truly stung, and Maya felt her throat tighten dangerously as Riley stared at her with so much contempt.

"You ruin _everything_. You always have to be the most beautiful, the cool one, the most talented one, the deep one, the interesting one. You always have to be better than me! You always have to turn everyone on your side! But that wasn't enough. You just _had to_ take Lucas too! You don't care about loyalty to your best friend, despite the fact that I stood by you all these years, fighting for you to get past the obstacles in your life because I have always believed in you. I supported you and defended you when my parents thought you were a bad influence. I fought for you when people dismissed you, tried to pin you with labels like you were some kind of street trash. I have always believed you were good. That you could break through the difficulties you'd been given in life. But you proved me wrong. You _are_ trash! And you're the worst!"

" _I'm_ the worst?" Maya snarled, "I've had it with you! You always have to be right. You can't stand it when something doesn't go your way, the way _you_ deem to be right. It's always your way or the highway. You can't stand it when the attention isn't on you! You can't stand it when _I'm_ happy for once. You can't stand it when I'm not the miserable, jaded, unhappy, unsuccessful, and broken little girl I used to be and you _want_ me to be that. Because it makes you seem better by comparison."

Riley's eyes narrowed angrily.

"Well guess what, Riley? I hate you too. I can't stand your little miss perfect act and your stupid fake clumsiness so you can seem cute and your perfect fucking family that you always complain about when you don't even realize how _lucky_ you are to have them! You have a great life but instead of focusing on everything that you do have and being happy with it, you're only pleased if I'm not as happy as you are! You can only be happy if I'm miserable because then you can show off all of your good fortune and rub it in my fucking face. But I'm _done_. This friendship is officially _over_."

"You know what? I agree." Riley yanked off her friendship ring, glaring at Maya as she walked straight to the garbage can. "I don't want to be best friends with a selfish person who has no regards for anyone but herself. In fact, I don't want to be friends with you at all. I hope you're happy."

She opened the garbage can and dropped the ring in. It hit the bottom with a resounding plunk that made Maya's heart squeeze tightly in her chest. Maya's eyes blurred with tears as she stomped to the trash can, yanked hers off and dropped it in too. Riley sucked in a sharp breath, her eyes watering again as her lip quivered.

"I _am_ happy." Maya sniffled shakily. "And I'm glad this toxic friendship is over. No more having to deal with your poison."

Riley stared at her for a moment, fighting to keep her tears at bay as her face contorted. Then with a flourish of a fruit scented perfume, she spun on her heel and stormed out of the apartment, not looking back once.

Maya let out a shaky breath, walking slowly back to her room in shock at the outcome of their fight, her finger feeling oddly bare without her ring. She pushed open her room door in a slight trance.

"Maya?" Lucas said in alarm, standing up and walking over to her, "You're crying. Are you okay?"

"Lucas…"

Her breathing harshened and grew shallow.

Though Maya tried to tell herself that their friendship had long been on the way to ruin anyway, that this was inevitable—a long time coming that had been building for years; that the Lucas situation was only the catalyst to the end—and it didn't bother her that they had ended their friendship, she wept bitterly, falling against Lucas and sobbing harshly, lamenting the loss of her best friend.

It felt like a part of her had just been ripped out.

~.~.~

The weeks leading up to graduation were hard.

News of Rilaya's fallout had spread like wildfire amongst their peers.

It was hard to believe.

The first few days, Maya would wake up, expecting to see Riley's good morning text, but when it wasn't there, the whole breakup would come rushing back and she would spend her mornings sobbing in bed until her mother came in to console her.

She didn't know if Riley was faring any better, but Maya knew she herself was an absolute wreck. So much so that her mother allowed her to skip taking any AP exams since she couldn't find it in her to study or even focus on anything remotely academic after that terrible end to a relationship that had defined her entire life for as long as she could remember.

It was _destroying_ her.

When she got past the initial heartache, she became stuck in a limbo, part of her in denial, the other part of her irritated and angry. And after that spell, indifference was her go to emotion. If she didn't feel anything, then she couldn't hurt.

But no longer being friends with Riley was easier said than done.

And it was brutal to live out.

There were times when Maya would see some cute jacket or see something cute that reminded her of Riley and she had to physically stop herself from buying it because she knew Riley would just love it.

Everything felt off balance.

Everything reminded her of Riley.

But there was absolutely no contact between them. No words exchanged. No information passed between them.

And as graduation approached, Maya began to resign herself to and accept the fact that their friendship really was over.

That Rilaya had died.

Thirteen years of a strong friendship.

Over.

It sent Maya into another wretched bout of tears, curling into herself as her shoulders shook with her heavy sobs.

~.~.~

Lucas did his best to be there for her, consoling her and keeping her company when she just needed a shoulder to cry on. And she was very grateful for him. So unbelievably grateful that she knew she had found someone who very much had seen her at her very worst and still stuck around regardless.

But even Lucas told her there was something missing from her. That she needed Riley.

"I don't." Maya answered on autopilot, snuggling further into his side on her couch as they watched a movie. "And I've made peace with it, so let's not talk about this the night before we finally graduate from the hell that is high school."

"Maya, it's time for you both to forgive each other." he continued anyway, not caring in the least that she had refused, "I talked to Riley yesterday to apologize for my behaviour. She looks like she hasn't slept in weeks, Maya. I've never seen her without that sparkle in her eyes before."

Maya knew that was all on her for breaking Riley's heart, and she stared at the ground in remorse.

"It doesn't matter anymore."

Her friendship with Riley would just be yet another failed chapter in the book she called Her Life that she would tuck away into the Dungeon of Sadness, never to be opened again and to become a long forgotten memory in the future. Gone were the dreams of getting married and pregnant at the same time so their children could marry each other and truly make them sisters. Gone were the dreams of growing old together, outliving their husbands and spending the rest of their lives as roomies in a nursing home, running around pulling pranks on all the other residents.

She stopped her train of thought of their planned life together before it brought another bout of tears to her eyes.

"You both are two peas in a pod. You're Rilaya. You can't not be together. It defies logic."

"Yeah? Well maybe I don't want to be that anymore." Maya grumbled. "Maybe I want to be Riley and Maya for once."

And then Lucas' lips curved into a smug, triumphant smile.

"See? Was that so hard to admit?"

"What?" She glanced at him with a raised, questioning brow.

"Just now. You didn't say you wanted to be _Maya_. You said you wanted to be Riley _and_ Maya, implying that you still want her as your partner in crime."

Maya rolled her eyes, going back to staring at the TV.

"And you can do that. There's a way to be with each other as you always have been, but as separate people. You can still be the very best friends you ever were. You just need to remember that you are not the same people and that you have different beliefs that neither of you should trample over." Lucas said, taking Maya's chin and turning her face so she was looking at him, "You guys need your friendship again because you're both miserable. And you need to find it again before she leaves and you guys aren't able to speak to each other anymore. Go talk to her. Neither of you are happy without each other. And I don't like seeing my girlfriend unhappy."

" _Girlfriend_?" Maya snorted derisively. "Oh so I'm your girlfriend now? When exactly did I agree to that?"

"Do you object to it?"

"I don't know. I never got a say in it. What if I don't want to be your girlfriend? I don't like—"

Maya was cut off with a sharp gasp when Lucas caught her lips with his, giving her a crude kiss that made Maya's mind momentarily go blank. She whimpered into his mouth, leaning into him as fire pooled low in her abdomen. It had been too long since she last got her Lucas fix. He broke away, their lips barely touching as they breathed each other's air. Maya blinked at him in shock, slightly dizzy and feeling such strong pangs of arousal that she almost couldn't breathe.

"...labels..." she finished weakly.

Lucas' gaze darkened. "Be my girlfriend or I won't kiss you ever again."

"That's not fair, you jackass."

"The choice is yours, Maya." He murmured against her lips, his tongue lightly running across her bottom lip.

Maya inhaled unsteadily, fighting her urge to let him win and just seduce the fuck out of her. He wouldn't win. Not this time.

"Fine." She breathed out against his lips, staring at them before slowly dragging her gaze to his eyes. They were smouldering. "I choose _not_."

And then with a laugh, Maya stood up from their comfortable position and started to walk away, but Lucas let out a low growl and caught her wrist before she could get far. He tugged her down and she was yanked backwards, falling onto his lap. He held her around the waist, preventing her escape again as she squirmed in his grasp.

"Maya. Be my girlfriend. Let's make it official." He whispered softly, his lips pressed against her ear from behind. "Please."

A shiver ran down Maya's back at his earnest words, and she let out a shaky breath.

"Yeah… I'll be your girlfriend."

She stood up, turning around and straddling him as she climbed on his lap. Lucas loosely held her hips, staring at her with such pure elation and warmth in his eyes that Maya's breath hitched in her chest. They didn't say anything, just gazing at each other, relishing in the time they had with each other.

There was something different in the way they looked at each other from before. Something scary, but profound, and Maya knew this was honestly real. She knew exactly what her feelings for Lucas were now no question about it. And though the revelation scared her, she welcomed it with open arms, her heart dancing in her chest as she held his gaze.

And she knew she had to tell him. She just couldn't figure out when the important moment she should would be.

"You'll talk to Riley?" he asked, searching her eyes, "I think she's ready to talk to you too. You guys need to heal."

"Yeah… I'll talk to her tomorrow."

"Good."

He leaned forward and pressed his lips to hers softly. Maya's eyes fluttered closed and she sighed in bliss into the kiss, draping her arms over his shoulders as they languidly made out.

She was so happy she'd found him. So happy he'd moved from Texas two years ago and made his way into her life.

Even if they were going to different schools for college, she could always trust that she'd have him around.

Maya wasn't one to put much stock in the future, but one thing she knew for sure was that she saw Lucas in hers.

No matter what scenario she put them in or what she saw for her life.

Lucas was always there.

~.~.~

Graduation day was a bustling day of wild festivities.

Maya's mom was over the moon happy and emotional that she was graduating with high honours and that she was the first Hart to finally get her diploma and graduate from high school.

As everyone expected, Farkle and Smackle—the nerdy power couple of their school—were co-valedictorians. Riley was salutatorian, and even though Maya knew Riley couldn't see her in the crowd as she gave her speech, Maya had a huge smile on her face.

She was proud of Riley. Even if they weren't exactly friends at the moment.

Maya was nervous the entire ceremony though. Because as the ceremony began to conclude, she knew she would have to go to Riley eventually and she was really apprehensive.

As Smackle made her part of the class address, Maya found herself paying more attention to what was going on than she had the entire ceremony. Her words truly resonated with Maya.

The speech was about how they'd all grown through their time in school. How despite the mistakes they'd made, despite all the difficulties they'd faced, they all made it to the end. They were all moving on to bigger and better things.

That it was time to let go of the past, to look back on it with fond memories and store them in their hearts, but to move on in order to open brand new chapters in their lives.

It was time for their rebirth into the world.

No longer as the people they used to be.

But the people they had become through their growth in their experiences.

Maya didn't know what compelled her to suddenly turn around, but she did. She sought out and found Riley in her seat a couple rows behind her. Riley had also been looking at her.

Their eyes met.

They stared at each other as Smackle concluded her speech.

And then Riley's lips curved up into a small smile.

And so did Maya's.

And suddenly, Maya wasn't afraid anymore.

~.~.~

Maya thought she would have to seriously scavenge around to find Riley through the bustling congregation of picture taking, laughing, and crying individuals and family, but as she made her way out, she found Riley standing near a large oak tree, a little secluded from everyone else. Maya swallowed thickly and made her way over to her. She had no idea what to say.

"Riley."

Riley turned around, the same slightly apprehensive look in her eyes that Maya knew she had in her own.

"Congratulations Maya. I know your mom must be really proud of you."

"Yeah. Almost too proud. She won't shut up about it." Maya smiled slightly. "And thanks. You too. Congrats on salutatorian and all. You deserve it."

"Thank you."

They fell a little silent, and Riley scuffed her shoe in the dirt a bit, chewing on her lower lip.

"It's only been three weeks." Maya finally broke the silence. "But it feels like it's been years since we last talked."

Riley giggled a bit. "That's because we were basically joined at the hip. And then we weren't."

They lapsed into silence once again, and Maya vaguely wondered to herself if Riley was also replaying the horrendous fallout in her mind.

"…What happened to us…" Maya muttered.

Riley sighed, turning and facing Maya directly, her expression serious and gaze somber.

"Our friendship got ruined because we stopped communicating. Because we started _lying_ to each other. Not because we let Lucas get between us." Riley said with a frown, "Maya. If you had just told me from the start that you liked him back in sophomore year, maybe we wouldn't have had this issue in the first place."

"…Are you trying to… blame _me_ for this?" Maya asked slowly, her brows furrowed.

"Yes and no. I'm just saying that was the start of both our lies. Way back in sophomore year. If I had known, I know I wouldn't have pushed you to make him interested in me. And you wouldn't have hidden your feelings for three years. And that wouldn't have led me to enforce that stupid pact we made in Texas after I found out how you really felt." Riley continued. "And honestly, I shouldn't have broken things off with Lucas if I really didn't want to. By setting that pact, I forced us both to try to conceal our desires. To try to find secret ways to pull Lucas to us without regard for the other of us. We didn't let a boy get between us. We let our _lies_ and other issues get between us and Lucas just happened to be one of the lies."

"Riley, I still need you in my life." Maya said once Riley quieted, "It's not the same without you."

"And I need you too. Always."

"Yeah. But we need some space from each other. We need to live as our own selves. I need to be me. Maya. And you need to be you. Riley." Maya smiled, feeling her eyes start to sting in the back with her impending tears. "We'll always be best friends. But we need to be Riley and Maya first and foremost and Rilaya second. We need to stop sacrificing everything we want for the other because that's what breeds resentment. I will always do my best to make sure you are happy no matter what, but only within reasonable bounds. Only if it's okay with me too. There's no point in sacrificing everything we want if it makes us miserable."

"I understand." Riley sniffled, her eyes glassy as she smiled back. "So can we try to start over? As Riley and Maya? The very best friends there ever were?"

"Of course."

Maya stepped into Riley's outstretched arms, embracing her with every ounce of love she could give the girl who defined parts of Maya without a doubt. The girl who would always hold the most important place in Maya's heart. Her favourite person in the whole wide world.

"Will we ever be okay?" Riley asked, her face buried in Maya's hair as she shook with silent sobs.

"It might take a while, but we'll get there…" Maya said, her voice wavering, "We'll fix it slowly, Riley. Piece by piece, right?"

"Yeah, we will."

And they both chuckled happily, clutching each other tighter as they reaffirmed their importance to one another.

It was the rebirth of their friendship.

And it was strange, but Maya believed they had needed to have the fallout so they could better understand each other and the place they had in each other's lives. They needed that fallout so they could realize that they were trying to live their lives as one entity which bred serious issues when their differences came into play instead of seeing themselves as two very different people with very different outlooks on life and ways of living.

But it was okay.

Because they'd learned from their mistakes.

And now they could move on to the next stage of their friendship. A _better_ stage.

Things weren't quite okay between them yet. They still had a lot to discuss and apologize for, and Maya had a feeling that there would be a bit more heartache in the future, but they were getting there.

They were slowly drifting back together.

~.~.~

Maya leaned against the balcony of the upper ballroom of the Minkus mansion, staring out at Jennifer's immaculate rose garden. She smiled as a soft breeze hit her, her hair dancing around her face as she closed her eyes and relished in the moment. Behind her, music from the graduation party blared from speakers, people chatting and celebrating the end of their high school era.

Maya normally would have been in there partying with the others, but she was in a contemplative mood and didn't really feel like being surrounded by noise at the moment. It'd been a long day filled with thousands of pictures and tears and neverending hugs, but now it was winding down a bit more. But she knew there would be lots of other parties and events their now graduated class would host.

She heard familiar footsteps approach her from behind and sure enough, Lucas settled beside her shortly after, leaning against the balcony as he stared out at the distance with her. She caught a whiff of the fancy cologne he'd worn for the event and subtly inhaled deeply, loving the scent on him.

"Can you believe the extravagance of this event?" Lucas said in awe, "I mean, I knew the Minkus mansion was huge from the Christmas party, but damn…"

"It's just a typical day in the Minkus household." Maya muttered, still lost in her thoughts.

"So why are you out here by yourself?" Lucas asked, nudging her gently and turning so he was facing her more directly. "Something wrong?"

"No. There's nothing wrong. Everything is strangely… _perfect_." Maya smiled at him. "I was just thinking about this whole year. It's been so weird. It's like for everything I lost, I gained something else. And for everything I gained, I lost something else. I don't know how to describe it."

"Yeah. I kind of know what you mean." Lucas said, cradling her cheek with a soft smile, "It's kind of like a growth thing. You have to lose something old to gain something and grow. For me, I shed a persona that I clung to desperately to create a new identity in my new life, but it was the very thing I needed to lose. Because in turn, I found _you_ : someone who accepts all of me, good _and_ bad and still wants me despite my issues."

"…Why do you understand me so well? College is going to be so weird without you."

"You better not kiss any guys." Lucas muttered playfully.

"Rude. I wouldn't do that to you." Maya's eyes narrowed in fake irritation. "I can't believe that's how you see me."

She spun on her heels to make her way back inside, but Lucas took her arm before she could get far, spinning her back into him until she was tucked into his arms, staring up at him in slight surprise. His hands settled on her lower back, right above her ass as he gazed down at her.

"I was just kidding."

"So was I, Huckleberry. You fell for it hook, line, and sinker."

"You're a pain in the ass, Shortstack."

She chuckled and then rose to her tiptoes, kissing him softly. As she pulled away, she stared into his eyes, her heart swelling in her chest.

And she knew this was the important moment she'd been waiting for.

"Lucas… I know maybe we're kind of young, and we might not really understand everything about how we feel, but I know how I feel about you." Maya finally admitted softly, blinking a bit nervously and staring at his Adam's apple. "I see you in my future. All of it. Umm… What I'm trying to say is that…uh…"

Lucas rose a patient brow as Maya stumbled over her words, and she mentally cursed her vulnerability in this moment. How hard was it to spit out a damn confession?

'Lucas… I think…" She took a deep breath and let it out slowly, bringing her gaze back up to his. "No. I do. I love you, Lucas."

"I love you too, Maya." Lucas said, his sea-foam gaze dancing with warmth.

She couldn't help the erratic beating of her heart as her cheeks erupted in a slight blush.

"How the fuck are you able to say it so easily?"

"I knew I was going to fall in love with you the second our fingers touched when I saw you for the first time. I've been waiting, storing it for years."

"Oh…"

They fell silent, smiling at each other with somewhat goofy grins on their faces. Maya felt giddy, her heart jumping in her chest and all the butterflies dancing in her stomach. She didn't think it could get any better than this.

"Hi." Lucas murmured softly, leaning down and leaving lingering kisses along her neck.

"Hey." Maya breathed out, chewing on her lower lip and tilting her head to give him more access.

"I have something to confess." Lucas muttered against her ear.

Maya squirmed under his touch, her body springing to life as his hands drifted down to cup her bum.

"And what's that?"

"Your ass in this dress is making me want to do naughty things with you on this balcony."

Maya snorted. "You're too addicted to sex."

"I'm addicted to you, baby."

"Hmmm…" She hummed, fiddling with the buttons of his dress shirt as he tugged on her ear lobe with his teeth. "Good answer."

"If I fuck you on this balcony, how long do you think before people figure out what we're doing?"

Maya's lips curved up into a dirty smirk as she pressed herself closer to him, making sure she made contact with his arousal. Lucas' eyes flared with heat.

"There's only one way to find out, isn't there?"


End file.
